Families That Have Evil In Them What To Do?

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PaulisSaved

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Families That Have Evil In Them.
You read enough through the decades of CFS and you find very clear toxicity and evil in ones own family's.
This makes it very hard to reach out for the Lord and to seek refuge in Christ.
When it comes to dealing with evil or sinful behavior within one’s family, the Bible provides guidance on how to respond while maintaining both love and righteousness. The challenge of confronting sin in a family context can be especially difficult, but Scripture emphasizes several key principles: love, truth, personal responsibility, and the importance of standing firm in faith. It has not always been easy to do so, evil in families hold guilt and toxicity on their families. creating a very confusiing situation.

1. Avoiding Participation in Evil​

The Bible is clear about avoiding evil and sinful behavior, even if it occurs within your family. Ephesians 5:11 (NIV) instructs:
"Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them."
This verse emphasizes that believers should not participate in sinful activities, even if others around them are engaging in them. While we are called to love our family members, this love does not mean condoning or participating in sinful behavior. We are called to live in holiness and righteousness, even if it requires distancing ourselves from certain behaviors. ( I have not spoken with my family other then my mom for 22 years due to the evil that exist.)

2. Standing Firm in Faith​

Joshua 24:15 (NIV) says:
"But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve... But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."
This well-known verse highlights the importance of making a firm decision to follow the Lord, regardless of the actions or beliefs of those around you, even family. Standing firm in your faith may require drawing boundaries when faced with ongoing sinful behavior or influence in your family. Peace can be found in God.

3. Confronting Sin in a Spirit of Love​

When dealing with family members involved in sin or evil, it is important to address it with love, humility, and grace. Galatians 6:1 (NIV) teaches:
"Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted."
Here, the Bible advises confronting sin gently and with the goal of restoration, not condemnation. If a family member is living in sin, the goal should be to lovingly help them recognize their wrongdoing and turn back to God. This is to be done with a spirit of humility, being careful not to fall into sin yourself.

4. The Priority of Following Christ, Even Over Family​

While the Bible calls believers to honor and love their families, Jesus makes it clear that following Him must come first, even above family ties. Matthew 10:34-37 (NIV) says:
"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— a man's enemies will be the members of his own household. Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."
This passage illustrates that allegiance to Christ may create tension or conflict within families, especially when family members are living in ways that are contrary to God’s will. Jesus calls His followers to put Him first, even if it means being at odds with family members who do not share the same values or faith.

5. Setting Boundaries While Maintaining Love​

There are times when believers may need to set healthy boundaries with family members engaged in persistent, unrepentant sin, especially if their behavior is harmful. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (NIV) speaks about not being "yoked together with unbelievers" and the importance of separating ourselves from unrighteousness. While this verse primarily refers to relationships with unbelievers, it also provides wisdom for avoiding toxic or harmful influences, even within family.
However, this does not mean cutting off family members or withholding love entirely. Romans 12:18 (NIV) encourages:
"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."
Believers should do their best to maintain peace and healthy relationships with family members while remaining faithful to God’s commandments.

6. Trusting God for Your Family's Transformation​

Ultimately, dealing with sin in the family can feel overwhelming, but God is the one who changes hearts. 1 Peter 3:1-2 (NIV) gives guidance on influencing others through a godly example:
"Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."
Though this verse is directed toward wives, the principle applies to all believers: living a Christ-like life can influence family members more than arguments or confrontation. By remaining faithful and embodying Christ’s love, you may help lead your family members toward repentance.

The Bible calls believers to avoid evil, even when it’s present within their families, and to respond with both truth and love. It’s important to stay faithful to God’s Word, maintain personal holiness, and gently confront sinful behavior while setting healthy boundaries when necessary. At the same time, believers should continue to love and pray for their family members, trusting that God is able to bring transformation in His time. You may fear being without your family or lonely. You will not be alone if you embrace Gods Grace.​

​

​

Paul

(edited for spelling errors)​

 
PaulisSaved said:
Families That Have Evil In Them.
You read enough through the decades of CFS and you find very clear toxicity and evil in ones own family's.
This makes it very hard to reach out for the Lord and to seek refuge in Christ.
When it comes to dealing with evil or sinful behavior within one’s family, the Bible provides guidance on how to respond while maintaining both love and righteousness. The challenge of confronting sin in a family context can be especially difficult, but Scripture emphasizes several key principles: love, truth, personal responsibility, and the importance of standing firm in faith. It has not always been easy to do so, evil in families hold guilt and toxicity on their families. creating a very confusiing situation.

1. Avoiding Participation in Evil​

The Bible is clear about avoiding evil and sinful behavior, even if it occurs within your family. Ephesians 5:11 (NIV) instructs:
"Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them."
This verse emphasizes that believers should not participate in sinful activities, even if others around them are engaging in them. While we are called to love our family members, this love does not mean condoning or participating in sinful behavior. We are called to live in holiness and righteousness, even if it requires distancing ourselves from certain behaviors. ( I have not spoken with my family other then my mom for 22 years due to the evil that exist.)

2. Standing Firm in Faith​

Joshua 24:15 (NIV) says:
"But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve... But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."
This well-known verse highlights the importance of making a firm decision to follow the Lord, regardless of the actions or beliefs of those around you, even family. Standing firm in your faith may require drawing boundaries when faced with ongoing sinful behavior or influence in your family. Peace can be found in God.

3. Confronting Sin in a Spirit of Love​

When dealing with family members involved in sin or evil, it is important to address it with love, humility, and grace. Galatians 6:1 (NIV) teaches:
"Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted."
Here, the Bible advises confronting sin gently and with the goal of restoration, not condemnation. If a family member is living in sin, the goal should be to lovingly help them recognize their wrongdoing and turn back to God. This is to be done with a spirit of humility, being careful not to fall into sin yourself.

4. The Priority of Following Christ, Even Over Family​

While the Bible calls believers to honor and love their families, Jesus makes it clear that following Him must come first, even above family ties. Matthew 10:34-37 (NIV) says:
"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— a man's enemies will be the members of his own household. Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."
This passage illustrates that allegiance to Christ may create tension or conflict within families, especially when family members are living in ways that are contrary to God’s will. Jesus calls His followers to put Him first, even if it means being at odds with family members who do not share the same values or faith.

5. Setting Boundaries While Maintaining Love​

There are times when believers may need to set healthy boundaries with family members engaged in persistent, unrepentant sin, especially if their behavior is harmful. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (NIV) speaks about not being "yoked together with unbelievers" and the importance of separating ourselves from unrighteousness. While this verse primarily refers to relationships with unbelievers, it also provides wisdom for avoiding toxic or harmful influences, even within family.
However, this does not mean cutting off family members or withholding love entirely. Romans 12:18 (NIV) encourages:
"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."
Believers should do their best to maintain peace and healthy relationships with family members while remaining faithful to God’s commandments.

6. Trusting God for Your Family's Transformation​

Ultimately, dealing with sin in the family can feel overwhelming, but God is the one who changes hearts. 1 Peter 3:1-2 (NIV) gives guidance on influencing others through a godly example:
"Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."
Though this verse is directed toward wives, the principle applies to all believers: living a Christ-like life can influence family members more than arguments or confrontation. By remaining faithful and embodying Christ’s love, you may help lead your family members toward repentance.

The Bible calls believers to avoid evil, even when it’s present within their families, and to respond with both truth and love. It’s important to stay faithful to God’s Word, maintain personal holiness, and gently confront sinful behavior while setting healthy boundaries when necessary. At the same time, believers should continue to love and pray for their family members, trusting that God is able to bring transformation in His time. You may fear being without your family or lonely. You will not be alone if you embrace Gods Grace.​

​

​

Paul​

​

(edited for spelling errors)​

Click to expand...
Paul some of those questions be difficult ones. But the reality is with most families is that blood be thicker than water at least with normal families not so sure about the dysfunctional ones. It’s a fine line that many have practiced and failed most miserably. We only have to take a look at the Jehovah Witnesses with the misery inflicted there with the separation of husband and wife and entire families in pursuit of such biblical holiness and separation doctrines. It often leads into legalism and to be back under the law more so with holiness movements. Love quickly disappears to be replaced with the coldness and judgement of the law. Perhaps all families all have their particular sins but the love of a family does cover a multitude of sins and protects itself from the accuser or accusers of the world or from within. The wheat and weeds grow side by side do they not. Start yanking the weeds out before the harvest and you might destroy both. My thoughts on such a difficult subject
 
Just adding a couple of verses into the mix:

And they took offense at Him. Then Jesus said to them, “Only in his hometown, among his relatives, and in his own household is a prophet without honor.” (Mark 6:3b,4 BSB)

As for you, what you intended against me for evil, God intended for good, in order to accomplish a day like this— to preserve the lives of many people. Therefore do not be afraid. I will provide for you and your little ones.” So Joseph reassured his brothers and spoke kindly to them.…(Genesis 50:20,21 BSB)
 
Prim90 said:
Paul some of those questions be difficult ones. But the reality is with most families is that blood be thicker than water at least with normal families not so sure about the dysfunctional ones. It’s a fine line that many have practiced and failed most miserably. We only have to take a look at the Jehovah Witnesses with the misery inflicted there with the separation of husband and wife and entire families in pursuit of such biblical holiness and separation doctrines. It often leads into legalism and to be back under the law more so with holiness movements. Love quickly disappears to be replaced with the coldness and judgement of the law. Perhaps all families all have their particular sins but the love of a family does cover a multitude of sins and protects itself from the accuser or accusers of the world or from within. The wheat and weeds grow side by side do they not. Start yanking the weeds out before the harvest and you might destroy both. My thoughts on such a difficult subject
Click to expand...
Morning Prim90. You are indeed right it is really complex. I do also agree with your assessment you made.
So much to think about. Thank you for adding this too :)
 
PaulisSaved said:
1. Avoiding Participation in Evil The Bible is clear about avoiding evil and sinful behavior, even if it occurs within your family. Ephesians 5:11 (NIV) instructs: "Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them." This verse emphasizes that believers should not participate in sinful activities, even if others around them are engaging in them. While we are called to love our family members, this love does not mean condoning or participating in sinful behavior. We are called to live in holiness and righteousness, even if it requires distancing ourselves from certain behaviors. ( I have not spoken with my family other then my mom for 22 years due to the evil that exist.)

2. Standing Firm in Faith​

Joshua 24:15 (NIV) says:
"But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve... But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."
This well-known verse highlights the importance of making a firm decision to follow the Lord, regardless of the actions or beliefs of those around you, even family. Standing firm in your faith may require drawing boundaries when faced with ongoing sinful behavior or influence in your family. Peace can be found in God.

3. Confronting Sin in a Spirit of Love​

When dealing with family members involved in sin or evil, it is important to address it with love, humility, and grace. Galatians 6:1 (NIV) teaches:
"Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted."
Here, the Bible advises confronting sin gently and with the goal of restoration, not condemnation. If a family member is living in sin, the goal should be to lovingly help them recognize their wrongdoing and turn back to God. This is to be done with a spirit of humility, being careful not to fall into sin yourself.

4. The Priority of Following Christ, Even Over Family​

While the Bible calls believers to honor and love their families, Jesus makes it clear that following Him must come first, even above family ties. Matthew 10:34-37 (NIV) says:
"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— a man's enemies will be the members of his own household. Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."
This passage illustrates that allegiance to Christ may create tension or conflict within families, especially when family members are living in ways that are contrary to God’s will. Jesus calls His followers to put Him first, even if it means being at odds with family members who do not share the same values or faith.

5. Setting Boundaries While Maintaining Love​

There are times when believers may need to set healthy boundaries with family members engaged in persistent, unrepentant sin, especially if their behavior is harmful. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (NIV) speaks about not being "yoked together with unbelievers" and the importance of separating ourselves from unrighteousness. While this verse primarily refers to relationships with unbelievers, it also provides wisdom for avoiding toxic or harmful influences, even within family.
However, this does not mean cutting off family members or withholding love entirely. Romans 12:18 (NIV) encourages:
"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."
Believers should do their best to maintain peace and healthy relationships with family members while remaining faithful to God’s commandments.

6. Trusting God for Your Family's Transformation​

Ultimately, dealing with sin in the family can feel overwhelming, but God is the one who changes hearts. 1 Peter 3:1-2 (NIV) gives guidance on influencing others through a godly example:
"Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives."
Though this verse is directed toward wives, the principle applies to all believers: living a Christ-like life can influence family members more than arguments or confrontation. By remaining faithful and embodying Christ’s love, you may help lead your family members toward repentance.

The Bible calls believers to avoid evil, even when it’s present within their families, and to respond with both truth and love. It’s important to stay faithful to God’s Word, maintain personal holiness, and gently confront sinful behavior while setting healthy boundaries when necessary. At the same time, believers should continue to love and pray for their family members, trusting that God is able to bring transformation in His time. You may fear being without your family or lonely. You will not be alone if you embrace Gods Grace.​

​

​

Paul​

​

(edited for spelling errors)​

Click to expand...
Prim90 said:
Paul some of those questions be difficult ones. But the reality is with most families is that blood be thicker than water at least with normal families not so sure about the dysfunctional ones. It’s a fine line that many have practiced and failed most miserably. We only have to take a look at the Jehovah Witnesses with the misery inflicted there with the separation of husband and wife and entire families in pursuit of such biblical holiness and separation doctrines. It often leads into legalism and to be back under the law more so with holiness movements. Love quickly disappears to be replaced with the coldness and judgement of the law. Perhaps all families all have their particular sins but the love of a family does cover a multitude of sins and protects itself from the accuser or accusers of the world or from within. The wheat and weeds grow side by side do they not. Start yanking the weeds out before the harvest and you might destroy both. My thoughts on such a difficult subject
Click to expand...
Sola gratia said:
Just adding a couple of verses into the mix: And they took offense at Him. Then Jesus said to them, “Only in his hometown, among his relatives, and in his own household is a prophet without honor.” (Mark 6:3b,4 BSB) As for you, what you intended against me for evil, God intended for good, in order to accomplish a day like this— to preserve the lives of many people. Therefore do not be afraid. I will provide for you and your little ones.” So Joseph reassured his brothers and spoke kindly to them.…(Genesis 50:20,21 BSB)
Click to expand...

Good morning, Prim90 and Sola gratia;

I'm blessed to have seen many families whose blood is thicker than water roll with the punches of family breakdown, especially the reconciliation of dysfunctional families. Usually the dysfunctional starts with one and like a domino effect it can spread like cancer. Many families do want to reconcile, they just don't know how to fix it. Reconciliation takes time and Solas gratia shares this in the story of Joseph.

But to dismiss the weeds in the family because of their heinous sin is not the example Jesus set. Yes, we should not condone the transgressions within our families but we should not limit God either. As Solas gratia shared, God will make a way and provides instruction for each of us regarding our families.

None of us are exempt from the sins in our families, nor is there a consolation of the sins that I brought upon them. In my personal testimony the Christian foundation in my family has not always been smooth, have been met with constant breakdown of confrontation, disagreements and sin. Still, God always made a way.

We have a large family in three states and two overseas in other countries. That's a lot of family. I'm the eldest sibling of 7 children. I was blessed to be the first child, grandchild, nephew and Godchild but it didn't shelter me from the undesirable circumstances I witnessed between family senior members and the wayward sins of our younger family members and the ones I brought upon the family and myself.

What To Do, or, what was my disposition with each circumstance is receiving the unconditional love God has given me. I did, later chose, and eventually desire to pass this love on to my family. This is the difficult part, but with God, it works!

The most recent thing that crossed my path was last year when I learned my sister went to my step Mom and made a bitter comment about me from 20+ years ago. She held this anger for 20+ years and never wanted to see or speak to me again. Out of nowhere my step Mom said this to me in front of my siblings and Dad. I was floored nor was I prepared to respond because I don't even remember this happening so long ago.

I do remember the ways of my sister and when she moved to Portland, Oregon, things got worse in her life. I didn't judge her (she's my sister) but continued to love, pray and what could I do for her during those years.

So what to do?

I prayed to God and confessed I seriously didn't remember that conversation and asked Him to search my heart. Then just between my sister and I without family involvement, I wrote her a letter and apologized for any wrongdoing on my part and hoped she will forgive me. That was it. Whether she forgives me or not is up to her.

What matters is I reassured my younger sister of my love, then got out of God's way and let her go. Since 20+ years later, she and her husband moved from Oregon, bought a home in Mississippi (with prosperous careers) and this year relocated to Florida so they can be closer to her daughter, son in law and grandchildren.

This is but one testimony of answered prayer to God and He did it His way. There still remain other areas of challenges in our family, some not so pleasant. But God can take care of all of them, especially the irreconcilable within our families. We can measure, make excuse and justify the impossible within our families but our God is much bigger than all our problems combined.

Many of us still have circumstances in our families that may take away God's glory. But your love from the Almighty and passed on to your loved ones is exactly what He wants each of us to do per Joseph's love and long suffering. In our eyes it may not bring resolve overnight. That's God's job and His time.

God bless you all. You have my continued prayers for your entire families.

Bob
 
Oh yes those dreaded family spats.

I have a son and a daughter, from a previous relationship (we weren't married, I wasn't a Christian back then ) and my son has spats with my sister's son a lot. They both grew up together, they are like chalk and cheese. One is an extrovert the other an introvert. They are the only 2 that really grumble in our family.

They are not speaking to each other at the moment and my son has cancelled his holiday with us this year because he doesn't want to go because because of the tension it's caused between them. They went on a holiday together not so long ago and my son has said he will never go on holiday with him again.

Half the time I don't even know they have fallen out, because no one tells me, except my daughter and I leave it in God's Hands.... Because my daughter has told me not to tell anyone...

So I am in a catch 22. I have been told in confidence, so my lips are sealed.
 
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