Firstborn, secondborn...

Have been thinking about this lately and wonder how our birth order does affect the way we grow up and our role in life.
In the Bible there are many priveliges of being firstborn, and also quite a few downsides to it. (The egyptian firstborns were all hit by a plague!)

Are you a firstborn child and if so can you share what this means to you? Did you feel the weight of being responsible for all your siblings..being your brothers (or sister's) keeper? Being the first to do everything, what is that like? Do people look to you to lead? And how blessed not to ever have hand me downs!
 
Hi Lanolin;

I was the first born in 1957 the eldest of my 7 siblings. Since you love to read you may get an idea of the times in the late 50s, 60s and 70s.

The privilege of being first born was first son, nephew and grandson. The downside was my parents were very young. Dad was 20 and served in the US Air Force, and Mom was 19 and a housewife. They made a lot of mistakes raising their first child so I was the guinea pig.

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Bobinfaith

When my other siblings were born, 3 more brothers and 3 sisters, Dad and Mom got much better at parenting. They also gave me responsibility to watch over my siblings as their big brother.

My Dad was a navigator in the Air Force and in 1968 and 1972 he did two tours during the Viet Nam war, so back in the states my role was "man of the house" and had to take on more for my Mom. My siblings and I got along, I argued with my sisters, fought with my brothers but at the end of the day we all got along, watched alot of TV since we didn't have personal pcs or listen to record albums or tape cassettes in the 70s.

I played in a rock band, played a lot of baseball, then at the age of 17 I managed Little League baseball for 6 years.

We were a church going family and during my teens I played guitar during Sunday service and helped teach Youth Group to the Junior High kids on Mondays.

My parents and siblings were very supportive of my activities and in turn I attended their activities.

In many ways the responsibilities given led me to grow up as the eldest, had to get a grip as a young Christian trying to understand our world views, especially in the United States - America was divided over the war, drugs were becoming more social, young people were becoming more free thinking and as a society began to question why authority was still living in the 60s, and music became more creative, etc...

But what stands out was how inspired I was over the Jesus Movement amongst young adults in the 70s, in high school we had what was called Teen Challenge, Youth groups amongst Christians. Christian contemporary music was taking on form - Jesus Christ Superstar, Godspell, and Maranatha music like "Create In Me A Clean Heart".

It wasn't all rosy, Lanolin, we had our devastating moments as a family and how I humiliated my parents and siblings with some bad years of sin and sampling young adulthood, but would rather focus this topic on the positive years.

I am very grateful to God for giving me those years, made a lot of mistakes and am thankful to be where I serve Him today so I can tell my story to others in hope that they will also grow in Christ Jesus.

God bless you, Lanolin and your family.
 
Thanks Bobinfaith thats very interesting what you say about being guinea pig and how young your parents were. Im second born but more of a middle child and tend to think I was a bit neglected. I dont know if parents get better at parenting the more children they have, for me because of the close ages mum had to keep an eye on four children under 4, so, I would think the eldest child had that special focus on their first few years without any siblings.

Responsibility is a big thing given to eldest children and being a pastor is an even bigger responsibilty, so can see why you would gravitate to that role. All your experience looking after your siblings!

Then again this might not be just a trait for eldest children, for David was the youngest of all his brothers and was picked to be King. Why because God could see his heart looking after his sheep as a shepherd boy.

Although in the world, kings are usually crowned as the eldest male child of any royal family. For example, Prince William is second in line to the throne after Prince Charles to be the King of England. Prince Harry doesnt need to worry about such a responsibility, being second born, and Princess Anne, well she was a girl! Princess Margaret, who was Queen Elizabeths sister, was a very different personality from her elder sibling.

Then theres Jacob and Esau, twins, yet the younger ended up inheriting the blessing when Esau decided he didnt want his birthright. Or he didnt deem it important. Being the second born means you surely know your place in the family...and for some that can cause a bit of anxiety or resentment. I was thinking on this recently when my boss, who is a firstborn, seems to place great importance on being first, or finishing first or being the fastest.. But me, being second born, and not being competitive person, cant think why you would insist on always being first if you know that in the order of your family there is just no way you can be first in anything!
 
In some families, they just name their children number one, two, three etc. so its easy to remember. I mean if you got 19 children would you have a hard time remembering all their names. I would. Well maybe not 19 thats exaggerating but I heard one christian family had 19 children and they all named their children begining with the letter 'J'. Joanna, Julia, Jonathon, Jackie, Jehsaphat, Jessica...etc.

One of my aunties, shes the third child. All her brothers and sisters call her number three. Lol.
 
I read a memoir about a number two son from a chinese american family.

What happened was his elder brother got killed young in a gang raid he was like a probation officer but was involved with helping delinquint youth in Oaklands chinatown. This devastated his brother. The family was five children so he was like the middle, third child. Which he seemed happy with, he didnt envy his sisters especially the second daughter. He third, youngest son, got away with everything as parents were less strict or probably more exhausted by the time he was born. The parents expected the sons to marry only chinese women. I dont think this was being racists its just they couldnt speak english/american. So it would be hard to relate. The youngest son was the only one to marry a chinese wife.

I think when children are young they tend to idolise their eldest sibling. They can be your best friend or your worst enemy.

In families that have only girls the dynamics are different. When Im reading about the twelve sons of Jacob I often wonder about Dinah, the only daughter. She got in trouble big time but her brothers retaliated and made things worse. I dont know if she ever got to inherit the promised land after that. Reuben the eldest also forfeited his birthright, as did Simeon and Levi for their disgraceful actions so it semed the mantle of leadership fell on Judah.
Josephs sons epharim and manasseh also had an interesting blessing. But Dinah is conspicuously absent.

Any other thoughts on being firstborn? The firstborns were given to God first as like the firstfruits were. But interestingly, instead of taking all the firstborn sons God called the Levites to serve in their stead.
 
In some families, they just name their children number one, two, three etc. so its easy to remember. I mean if you got 19 children would you have a hard time remembering all their names. I would. Well maybe not 19 thats exaggerating but I heard one christian family had 19 children and they all named their children begining with the letter 'J'. Joanna, Julia, Jonathon, Jackie, Jehsaphat, Jessica...etc. One of my aunties, shes the third child. All her brothers and sisters call her number three. Lol.

lol! How funny!
 
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