Is There Ever An Excuse For High Voltage Christian Parenting?

#21
is this a test of my scriptural knowledge?

what about Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged

I have this feeling you are aware of this passage already

both parents and children have responsibility towards the Lord
yes, just double checking, I do not want to assume…

COL 3:20 Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
COL 3:21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
 
#24
He also had a really impulsive personality and had a temper ( though I think he did certain ability to control his temper if he wanted to , but he was one those people who seemed believe ,this is who I am, take it or leave it). His interpretation of scripture means he is someone who believes in tough love at all cost, by any means necessary......., all of these just means that despite he was man who was genuinely a loving person with a great deal of charm, he could actually be really overbearing and not respect others boundaries, as long as he believed his intention was good.

I think his son were facing certain issues at that time, and he found it difficult to explain to his father his situation without his father cut him half way through and accuse him of making excuses so on and so forth. Like I mentioned, because of his father personality , his dad can sometimes have a simplistic way of viewing things, and he did not understand or maybe he did not want to understand why his son could not just get on with it like he himself would do in the same situation.
Ah ok, thanks for the details….yeah, that father is difficult to please…

but I noticed that one I made in red font….

Is your friend not living anymore with his father’s income?

That is primary parent concern: we know we all die: parent want to see their son know how to stand on their own…
 
#25
so if love my son , I could use this passage as a way to justify why I chose beat black and blue?
Can you?

God doesn't sanction beating. He also doesn't sanction the milquetoast-y kind of discipline the culture is bent on today, producing people who have no regard to any form of authority.
 
#26
Ah ok, thanks for the details….yeah, that father is difficult to please…

but I noticed that one I made in red font….

Is your friend not living anymore with his father’s income?

That is primary parent concern: we know we all die: parent want to see their son know how to stand on their own…
Ok

here is my stance on this matter

I do agree we need to discipline our children for their own good.

I do think that when a child is young, appropriate amount of physical discipline is called for when appropriate.

that said, ultimately, we are all responsible to the Lord.

whether you are a child, or a parent.

a child has obligation to honour his parents no matter what

a parent has the obligation to act in the best interest of the child.

a parent doesn't own his child, and can not have this mentality along the line of " he is my son, I can do whatever I want, as he has the obligation to honour me"

any, if you set aside everything else, what do you think love is according to scripture? is it not acting in the best interest of the other person.

is that not why scripture teaches us Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

The emphasize is on what is in the child best interest, not on parents perceived right to discipline.

that is why I have a huge problem every time I hear parents say things like ( I am not saying you are like this), I have RIGHT to do this, I have RIGHT to do that. it is all ME ME ME ME ME !

it is like scripture teaching on how husbands and wives should interact with each other, yes, husband is the head of the wife , but Christ is the head of the husband

in another word, the husband cant do whatever he wants, he still have answer to Christ and more importantly, husbands are taught they need to love their wives as Christ loves the church, even willing to die for her.

I have seen Christian husbands focuses on Christ teaching to their wives, but neglecting on the obligations Christ has placed on themselves, and I am sure their are many Christian wives who do the same.

anyway, goes back this father I am talking about, if you don't mind me being blunt, good intention doesn't cut it. And use that as an excuse of not acting in his son's best interest is a form of pride. Whether or not his son was living under his roof or on his income is irrelevant in a sense that it does not negate his duty to act in the best interest of the son that God has placed in his life and entrusted him with.
 
#27
Can you?

God doesn't sanction beating. He also doesn't sanction the milquetoast-y kind of discipline the culture is bent on today, producing people who have no regard to any form of authority.
I was questioning whether Christian parents have the right to do whatever they want.

of course I am aware that God don't condone physical beating of one's child.
 
#30
well, I cant tell you exactly what went through the father mind when he did those things.

but I did get to know him really well, and got a chance to get a real glimpse into his personality as well as how his mind works.

He was someone who was more of a "doer" as oppose to a "thinker", as result, he seemed to have the tendency to see things in black and white, and was unable to appreciate ( or maybe he did not want to) complexity of situations. And he has the tendency to view things from his own reference point only.
Is this because your friend is gay?
 
#31
Ok

here is my stance on this matter

I do agree we need to discipline our children for their own good.

I do think that when a child is young, appropriate amount of physical discipline is called for when appropriate.

that said, ultimately, we are all responsible to the Lord.

whether you are a child, or a parent.

a child has obligation to honour his parents no matter what

a parent has the obligation to act in the best interest of the child.

a parent doesn't own his child, and can not have this mentality along the line of " he is my son, I can do whatever I want, as he has the obligation to honour me"

any, if you set aside everything else, what do you think love is according to scripture? is it not acting in the best interest of the other person.

is that not why scripture teaches us Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

The emphasize is on what is in the child best interest, not on parents perceived right to discipline.

that is why I have a huge problem every time I hear parents say things like ( I am not saying you are like this), I have RIGHT to do this, I have RIGHT to do that. it is all ME ME ME ME ME !

it is like scripture teaching on how husbands and wives should interact with each other, yes, husband is the head of the wife , but Christ is the head of the husband

in another word, the husband cant do whatever he wants, he still have answer to Christ and more importantly, husbands are taught they need to love their wives as Christ loves the church, even willing to die for her.

I have seen Christian husbands focuses on Christ teaching to their wives, but neglecting on the obligations Christ has placed on themselves, and I am sure their are many Christian wives who do the same.

anyway, goes back this father I am talking about, if you don't mind me being blunt, good intention doesn't cut it. And use that as an excuse of not acting in his son's best interest is a form of pride. Whether or not his son was living under his roof or on his income is irrelevant in a sense that it does not negate his duty to act in the best interest of the son that God has placed in his life and entrusted him with.
Until you are a parent you have no real clue on this subject.
 
#32
Until you are a parent you have no real clue on this subject.
scripture is clear on God expectation on what parenting is.

and I have "perfect" clue on His words

though a parent can certainly exercise their free will to do whatever they like.

but that doesn't make it right.
 
#33
The first commandment with a promise is to children, so that they may live long on the earth.

Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Eph 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
Eph 6:3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
Eph 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
 
#34
When I was growing up they disciplined us in school. That made a believer out of every one. We left our guns at home. :)

Heb 12:7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father?
Heb 12:8 If you are not disciplined--and everyone undergoes discipline--then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all.
Heb 12:9 Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live!
Heb 12:10 They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness.
Heb 12:11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
 
#35
The first commandment with a promise is to children, so that they may live long on the earth.

Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Eph 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
Eph 6:3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
Eph 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
well, I think the point here is God place expectations on both parties

sure, even if a Christian has parents that doesn't abide in God words, should you still honour them, yes.

but it is unacceptable for Christian parents to not abide in God words when they are dealing with their children either.
 
#36
When I was growing up they disciplined us in school. That made a believer out of every one. We left our guns at home. :)

Heb 12:7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father?
Heb 12:8 If you are not disciplined--and everyone undergoes discipline--then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all.
Heb 12:9 Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live!
Heb 12:10 They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness.
Heb 12:11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
I see your point

and I am sure you would agree with me, the kind of discipline God gave us is always done with pure motive, with our best interest at heart.

it is "not" some form of power trip, it never is the case with Him

and Christian parents should try do the same

Because Christian parents still have the obligation to answer to God on how they raised their children, like in everything else.

it is not OK for any Christians ( and some might disagree) to have this mentality I am going to do whatever I like just because.

God is the one that decide how things should be done, our job as His servants is to recognize that authority and abide by it

any Christian parents who enjoy power tripping should be utterly ashamed of themselves.
 
#37
well, I think the point here is God place expectations on both parties

sure, even if a Christian has parents that doesn't abide in God words, should you still honour them, yes.

but it is unacceptable for Christian parents to not abide in God words when they are dealing with their children either.
This is where our society has fallen down. The Devil has been attacking the family unit for a very long time. He knows if he can break up and destroy our families and redefine them as something different he can do anything he wants.
 
#38
This is where our society has fallen down. The Devil has been attacking the family unit for a very long time. He knows if he can break up and destroy our families and redefine them as something different he can do anything he wants.
I am not quite sure what you are talking about here.

but honestly, I don't want to get into any form of discussion on homosexuality again.

I will say this though, I have utter most respect for non traditional form of family, including single parents.

I know many who grew up in to those type of households that turn out to be most outstanding law abiding, God loving citizens.
 
#39
I see your point

and I am sure you would agree with me, the kind of discipline God gave us is always done with pure motive, with our best interest at heart.

it is "not" some form of power trip, it never is the case with Him

and Christian parents should try do the same

Because Christian parents still have the obligation to answer to God on how they raised their children, like in everything else.

it is not OK for any Christians ( and some might disagree) to have this mentality I am going to do whatever I like just because.

God is the one that decide how things should be done, our job as His servants is to recognize that authority and abide by it

any Christian parents who enjoy power tripping should be utterly ashamed of themselves.
I think the biggest way of training our children is by being a living example of how they are to live. Kids always want emulate their parents. They want to be just like them.
 
#40
I think the biggest way of training our children is by being a living example of how they are to live. Kids always want emulate their parents. They want to be just like them.
that how I know I would become the most amazing father one day :D

and I don't think sterilize the entire non Christian population is biblical either, nor are there any evidence that a person who grew in non Christian household would turn out to be some kind pervert or atheist.

I should know, I am a first generation Christian.


surely you are not suggesting my parents should not been allowed to have me simply because they were / and still are non believers;)

and I am sure many on this forum are probably in the same situation, and would feel utterly insulted if any trying to suggest their parents were somehow bad parents simply because they were and maybe still non believers either.