Mr. Common Sense


Mr. Common Sense

London Times Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense
> Date: Sunday, May 4, 2008, 5:29 PM
> 'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
> has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he/she was,
> since birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. Common sense
> will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
> Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the
> worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
> Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
> than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in
> charge).
> His/her health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
> overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
> charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
> from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
> reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his/her condition.
> Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
> job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
> children.
> It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
> consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could
> not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an
> abortion.
> Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
> and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common
> Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in
> your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
> Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
> realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
> her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
> Common Sense was preceded in death by his/her parents, Truth and Trust; his
> wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He
> is survived by his 4 step brothers -I Know My Rights, I Want It Now,
> Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.
> Not many attended his/her funeral, because so few realized he/she was gone. If
> you still remember him/her, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do
> nothing.'