Persevering through trauma

I went back to the hospital last Monday to remove the IVC filter and G-Tube that had been installed last May during my ICU stay. This was the first time back in the hospital. It was an outpatient visit, but they still had me undress and wear a hospital robe. They also wheeled me through the hospital in a bed. The experience was surreal. It brought back lots of buried memories. Although I was only there half a day, I felt re-traumatized none the less and have since been working through my feelings.

Pain comes in many forms but emotional pain is arguably worst. Fear, anxiety, panic -- these wear down the mind and pain the soul. Yet these are the very pains that we are most hesitant to discuss. These are the pains that we hide to ourselves. These are the pains that we suffer in silence. It is only when we finally lose control and we can no longer hide our pain that we share with others, and by then it is often too late. Others see our pain and reflexively shy away as if we are somehow infectious, as is we are pariah. This only furthers our feelings of isolation and heighten our pain.

The enemy is strong at work. He wants us afraid. He wants us alone. Like a pack of wolves he seeks out the weakest among the herd, separates them from the others and devours them as the herd runs away, each member thankful that he was not the one targeted, at least not today. But the wolves do not stop, and neither does the enemy. Thus it is vital that we share our feelings. We must share our pains. We must carry each other's burdens, for only in this way do we remain one -- together, unified, unafraid.
 
I went back to the hospital last Monday to remove the IVC filter and G-Tube that had been installed last May during my ICU stay. This was the first time back in the hospital. It was an outpatient visit, but they still had me undress and wear a hospital robe. They also wheeled me through the hospital in a bed. The experience was surreal. It brought back lots of buried memories. Although I was only there half a day, I felt re-traumatized none the less and have since been working through my feelings.

Pain comes in many forms but emotional pain is arguably worst. Fear, anxiety, panic -- these wear down the mind and pain the soul. Yet these are the very pains that we are most hesitant to discuss. These are the pains that we hide to ourselves. These are the pains that we suffer in silence. It is only when we finally lose control and we can no longer hide our pain that we share with others, and by then it is often too late. Others see our pain and reflexively shy away as if we are somehow infectious, as is we are pariah. This only furthers our feelings of isolation and heighten our pain.

The enemy is strong at work. He wants us afraid. He wants us alone. Like a pack of wolves he seeks out the weakest among the herd, separates them from the others and devours them as the herd runs away, each member thankful that he was not the one targeted, at least not today. But the wolves do not stop, and neither does the enemy. Thus it is vital that we share our feelings. We must share our pains. We must carry each other's burdens, for only in this way do we remain one -- together, unified, unafraid.
Praying for you today my brother Jason! Love you bro!
 
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