Signs

#1
Signs

[SIZE=+1]"Signs" [/SIZE]



Spotted in the toilet of a London office: "Toilet out of order. Please use floor below."

In a Laundromat: "Automatic washing machines. Remove all your clothes when the light goes out."

In a London department store: "Bargain Basement upstairs."

In an office: "Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday bring it back, or further steps will be taken."

In an office: "After tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board."

Outside a secondhand shop: "We exchange everything -- bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?"

Notice in health food shop window: "Closed due to illness."

Spotted in a safari park: "Elephants stay in your car."

Seen during a conference: "For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care center on the 1st floor."

Notice in a farmer's field: "The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

Message on a leaflet: "If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons."

On a repair shop door: "We can repair anything. Please knock on the door -- the bell doesn't work."
 
#2
Spotted in the toilet of a London office: "Toilet out of order. Please use floor below."
No, I think I'll just go somewhere else.

In a Laundromat: "Automatic washing machines. Remove all your clothes when the light goes out."
What happens if the light doesn't go out?

In a London department store: "Bargain Basement upstairs."
I thought basements were downstairs? :D

In an office: "Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday bring it back, or further steps will be taken."
Let me know which ones and I'll personally take them. One by one.

In an office: "After tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board."
Y'all can have the draining board. I'm going to get a cake.
Outside a secondhand shop: "We exchange everything -- bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?"
And I thought wifeswap was bad enough. :eek:

Notice in health food shop window: "Closed due to illness."
Guess he forgot the morning pills, eh?

Spotted in a safari park: "Elephants stay in your car."
I have an elephant. Here, take him.

Seen during a conference: "For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care center on the 1st floor."
Good thing there's no more "Kid Magnet" on eBay.

Notice in a farmer's field: "The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
99 cents a step too; hopefully you'll make it far enough to put the money down.

Message on a leaflet: "If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons."
They'll have to have someone tell them - remember, they can't read!


On a repair shop door: "We can repair anything. Please knock on the door -- the bell doesn't work."
And you expect them to know how to repair anything... :rolleyes:
 
#4
That reminds me of a sign in the next town over from me. It was in front of a school.

“FREE ENGLISH LESSONS”

Now if someone doesn’t know how to read English, how are they going to know? :rolleyes:
 
#6
I went grocery shopping just recently and took a back road to the store where I usually go - Grocery Outlet.

I was bouncing around on the back roads in Redmond and came to a sign...NO OUTLET.

In the near-distance, at the end of this road, there was the big sign for the store: GROCERY OUTLET.

:eek:

I'm going to have to go back there and get a pic.