Some Jokes I've Recently Seen

BibleLover

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I'd never go to a psychiatrist because persons who go to psychiatrists should have their heads examined.

Three animals died and stood at the entrance of pet heaven. God looked at the first one, a Rotweiler, and asked why it deserved to be admitted. The dog replied, "I was a loyal protector." It was then admitted. God turned to the next dog, a Golden Retriever, and asked the same question. The dog replied, "I was a loving companion." It was admitted. God turned to the the third animal, cat, and asked the same question. The cat replied simply, "You're sitting in my chair."

A certain woman's family was rigidly devoted to Saturday family game nights, so when she died, the family had her cremated and placed in an hour glass to continue to act as the official timer for the games.
 
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