Sorry, for the Grouch and Distancing.

PaulisSaved

PaulisSaved

My apologies for the absence.
And for being grouchy as well.

Seems even I can get overloaded. Hard for me to admit I am powerless as between God and myself I usually can roll through it.
In the last two months, two family deaths, father in law dying and actually is in the Hospital. Mom is now on Hospice.
Everything in the house is breaking, had electricians, Plumber and roofers all since May. Seems like I was bleeding out money.
So I threw myself a pity party and took my toys and played by my self.

In the middle of all this poor me party, My son is now in remission after 10 years of suffering, I actually forgot to be grateful I could afford all those repairs.
I had to buy a refrigerator today as our 17 year old one is dying and I can afford that. I was able to give my son money to help open his business.

Right about here I would enter scripture, but not this time. As I know in my heart that is was me that stepped aside and tried to deal with it.
I am reminded how ever. Adam and Eve, how they were temped and ignored what they already had.

Being honest, I am still grouchy, maybe a little pissy. Been talking with God and I can see him working with me as I pick my self up.
I have been wondering why God pulled me away from Pastoral stuff. And now it makes allot of sense why.

Just going to keep this short, and again my apologies for being short, or grouchy.

Paul
 
PaulisSaved said:
In the middle of all this poor me party, My son is now in remission after 10 years of suffering, I actually forgot to be grateful I could afford all those repairs.
I had to buy a refrigerator today as our 17 year old one is dying and I can afford that. I was able to give my son money to help open his business.
Click to expand...
Just led to post you some lyrics from the song What You Give by Tesla:

It's not whatcha got, it's what you give.
It ain't the life you choose, it's the life you live.
No, no, no, no, no!
It's not whatcha got, it's what you give.
And it ain't what it's not, but what it is!
Only what you give.
 
Good morning Paul....

I struggle with distancing myself all the time. I don't do it on purpose... I post something and then before I know it... a few days have passed and I have not maintained daily participation. This will get better over the winter months when it's too cold to go outside.

You mentioned in the Garage that you consider a year a significant milestone. I do too. The difference within these forums is that everyone bears their own weight. We are very aware of the fact that LIFE happens and sometimes things get complicated.

I feel very much at home here and it is the LOVE I have for the people here that draws me back. That is my force of keeping me grounded and part of this community.... otherwise... I would have faded out a long time ago.

No one has ever mentioned to me WHY don't I post daily... I am simply embraced and accepted AS I AM.

Please don't ever feel badly for VENTING... or "being in a not so ideal space". These honest declarations help us to pray for one another more accurately.

God bless you my friend. Most tenderly,,, In Awe of Him
 
bobinfaith said:
Hello Paul;

No need to apologize for being absent. If you had the chance to receive other's posts to your previous threads, no one was dismissing you as being grouchy or feeling down.

Welcome back, brother, to your family and friends at CFS.

God bless you and your entire family.

Bob
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Thank You brother Bob,
Do you remember when I said I am trying to ground myself.
I have not been able to find how to do that. My difficulty is simple.
I have been learning about God and Jesus since I was a Kid.
I became a Pastor and I am respected by many people for that. I do know it was a gift to serve and always humbled by that.
I do not think I was worthy, but God does, so I was good with that.
But I feel like a Doctor that has no patients. What do pastors do when they retire?

I may not appear grouchy or distant, but I feel that way. I met with a fellow pastor a week ago.
Was nice to be in a area of comfort, as we had coffee and chatted for over and hour it was refreshing and felt normal.
You get in that zone and God and the Holy Spirit are very present and its actually very enjoyable.
I am trying to meet the needs of family we all have those responsibilities. Why trying to seek, who am I now?
Some might like the break from being the "GUY" . But that kept me grounded for a few decades.

I feel like its a title of a book, where do they send Pastors when service is done?
I think about my wife, she I met her at a Restaurant I was working at about 40 years ago in 1984.
We moved and she has been the Dining Director where she works just about as long as I have been a pastor.
So its part of whom she is.
And I know in about 3 years she will retire. She is not just a Dinning Director, but is well known nation wide for her
caring nature and how she involves her day with Residents at the Memory Care facility. But it will be over 25 year there when she retires.
And we talk about. How does she stop doing something she has passionately done half her life.

I joined here and other places hoping the empty nest area could be filled.
 
PaulisSaved said:
Thank You brother Bob,
Do you remember when I said I am trying to ground myself.
I have not been able to find how to do that. My difficulty is simple.
I have been learning about God and Jesus since I was a Kid.
I became a Pastor and I am respected by many people for that. I do know it was a gift to serve and always humbled by that.
I do not think I was worthy, but God does, so I was good with that.
But I feel like a Doctor that has no patients. What do pastors do when they retire?

I may not appear grouchy or distant, but I feel that way. I met with a fellow pastor a week ago.
Was nice to be in a area of comfort, as we had coffee and chatted for over and hour it was refreshing and felt normal.
You get in that zone and God and the Holy Spirit are very present and its actually very enjoyable.
I am trying to meet the needs of family we all have those responsibilities. Why trying to seek, who am I now?
Some might like the break from being the "GUY" . But that kept me grounded for a few decades.

I feel like its a title of a book, where do they send Pastors when service is done?
I think about my wife, she I met her at a Restaurant I was working at about 40 years ago in 1984.
We moved and she has been the Dining Director where she works just about as long as I have been a pastor.
So its part of whom she is.
And I know in about 3 years she will retire. She is not just a Dinning Director, but is well known nation wide for her
caring nature and how she involves her day with Residents at the Memory Care facility. But it will be over 25 year there when she retires.
And we talk about. How does she stop doing something she has passionately done half her life.

I joined here and other places hoping the empty nest area could be filled.
Click to expand...

Hello Paul;

It happens, brother. Pastors who feel they've hit a crossroads, "wondering what am I going to do next" or "where do they send Pastors when service is done?" This may be a contemplation to step down for good. God permits that.

Most called Pastors never retire from ministry. A Pastor may change seasons from a Church, missionary, seminary, men/women's recovery, etc...but in between a Pastor's spirit is "balance of their time" to minister more to immediate family (which seems to be where God has you during this time,) others spend more time with their wife and children, visitation, serving meals, youth, singles and marital counsel, etc...

There is no limitation to God's assigned ministry. Truth is, the sheep continue to be plenty and the workers are still few.

God called me to step down from my former home Church in 2022. After grooming a younger Pastor to succeed me, I spent a year in between praying for God's next appointment. This gave me time to spend more with my wife, home projects, traveling vacation opportunities, the sale of our home to family, visitations in nursing homes, but spending more quality time with my wife.

My next appointment by God was obvious. I was called to my current ministry, Church Renewal. It's role helps dying Churches revitalize, provide pulpit supply (preaching) to Churches without a Pastor, and help vet new replant Pastors.

Paul, going out for coffee with your fellow Pastor was good and I would encourage you to follow up with him and other Pastors you may know. I have maintained a relationship with 4 or 5 seasoned Pastors in the last 20 years that I consider my mentors and have kept me accountable. We'll have coffee, grab a sandwich and just enjoy catching up, fellowship, conversation and discussing/praying over extreme people circumstances.

All the other "in between situations" you shared aside from Pastoral Ministry is not unique. We all have our share of challenges in life on and off the field, mostly people. Then when we get back the next day in ministry we deal mostly with people.

On to the issue of joining Christian Forum Site. I feel you're a very busy man of God, and you have mentioned a good fit in previous posts, and an empty nest getting filled in your membership. I believe God will take care of the good fit and settle the nest here for you at end of 2024 and in 2025.

I respect your honesty and opening up here to everyone. You remain in my prayers.

God bless you, Paul, and thank you.

Bob
 
bobinfaith said:
Hello Paul;

It happens, brother. Pastors who feel they've hit a crossroads, "wondering what am I going to do next" or "where do they send Pastors when service is done?" This may be a contemplation to step down for good. God permits that.

Most called Pastors never retire from ministry. A Pastor may change seasons from a Church, missionary, seminary, men/women's recovery, etc...but in between a Pastor's spirit is "balance of their time" to minister more to immediate family (which seems to be where God has you during this time,) others spend more time with their wife and children, visitation, serving meals, youth, singles and marital counsel, etc...

There is no limitation to God's assigned ministry. Truth is, the sheep continue to be plenty and the workers are still few.

God called me to step down from my former home Church in 2022. After grooming a younger Pastor to succeed me, I spent a year in between praying for God's next appointment. This gave me time to spend more with my wife, home projects, traveling vacation opportunities, the sale of our home to family, visitations in nursing homes, but spending more quality time with my wife.

My next appointment by God was obvious. I was called to my current ministry, Church Renewal. It's role helps dying Churches revitalize, provide pulpit supply (preaching) to Churches without a Pastor, and help vet new replant Pastors.

Paul, going out for coffee with your fellow Pastor was good and I would encourage you to follow up with him and other Pastors you may know. I have maintained a relationship with 4 or 5 seasoned Pastors in the last 20 years that I consider my mentors and have kept me accountable. We'll have coffee, grab a sandwich and just enjoy catching up, fellowship, conversation and discussing/praying over extreme people circumstances.

All the other "in between situations" you shared aside from Pastoral Ministry is not unique. We all have our share of challenges in life on and off the field, mostly people. Then when we get back the next day in ministry we deal mostly with people.

On to the issue of joining Christian Forum Site. I feel you're a very busy man of God, and you have mentioned a good fit in previous posts, and an empty nest getting filled in your membership. I believe God will take care of the good fit and settle the nest here for you at end of 2024 and in 2025.

I respect your honesty and opening up here to everyone. You remain in my prayers.

God bless you, Paul, and thank you.

Bob
Click to expand...


Thank you brother Bob,
And for sharing how you adjusted and that you had made it out the other side.
I only know myself of one pastor that retired and that I knew well. Maybe I am holding his difficulty in my life some?
As he crashed at about my age, became overwhelmed and left the church. I reached out several times and he never reached back.
This was about 7 years ago, we had a very close relationship, also saw him as my mentor, we used to meet each week and
it just stopped, so you can see how my concerns may be more then then truly are. So your message helps.
I appreciate as well, letting me know its normal. I have never been in this spot before. I thought I would retire 10 years from now.
But you are right my friend, as my wife and other family members have latched on to my availability. And I am OK with this.

I am praying on this each day and I appreciate the prayers as well. Where my wife works in Memory Care the last twenty years, and where I volunteer. The Admin asked yesterday if I would help out there. I do now as a official volunteer, but now they want to pay me. That would help as well, and is where my Mom is a resident, and wife works, as well as my Son volunteers. Perhaps a door opening?

Thank You Bob, and thank you for your fellowship since I joined truly appreciate it.
And to everyone else the prayers are helpful, I think about this place allot, and the good people here.

Paul

May Christ Fill You Day.
 
PaulisSaved said:
Maybe I am holding his difficulty in my life some? And, Perhaps a door opening?
Click to expand...

Hey Paul, brothers and sisters;

Well, yes, brother. We all do and have that one or two person(s) who is on our heart. I believe God put that person(s) there for His purpose and reason.

That's why I'm so blessed to be a part of this loving group of men and women who give their all in all and press on each day. When I'm dealing with my situation and read how others can relate just from reading their testimony / prayer request.

It feels good when I log on here. These are real people who love the Lord.

It blesses me when my wife has confidence and depends on me to do the little things. So when it comes to the big things she knows I'll be there.

Same thing goes for our widows or widowers who have one special person there for them, a partner in ministry, coworker, an only friend, and a family here (CFS). That is a huge door that remains open for them.

Praise God for that door that's open continuously, for a spouse and closest family. They are counting on God but looking to us to be there to lead. Of course God is always there but so are we. I know we and they wouldn't trade that for the world.

God bless everyone.
 
PaulisSaved said:
Thank you brother Bob,
And for sharing how you adjusted and that you had made it out the other side.
I only know myself of one pastor that retired and that I knew well. Maybe I am holding his difficulty in my life some?
As he crashed at about my age, became overwhelmed and left the church. I reached out several times and he never reached back.
This was about 7 years ago, we had a very close relationship, also saw him as my mentor, we used to meet each week and
it just stopped, so you can see how my concerns may be more then then truly are. So your message helps.
I appreciate as well, letting me know its normal. I have never been in this spot before. I thought I would retire 10 years from now.
But you are right my friend, as my wife and other family members have latched on to my availability. And I am OK with this.

I am praying on this each day and I appreciate the prayers as well. Where my wife works in Memory Care the last twenty years, and where I volunteer. The Admin asked yesterday if I would help out there. I do now as a official volunteer, but now they want to pay me. That would help as well, and is where my Mom is a resident, and wife works, as well as my Son volunteers. Perhaps a door opening?

Thank You Bob, and thank you for your fellowship since I joined truly appreciate it.
And to everyone else the prayers are helpful, I think about this place allot, and the good people here.

Paul

May Christ Fill You Day.
Click to expand...
Paul we all learn from Sesame Street that we all do have our Grouchy moments. Oscar number 1 : ) ❤️not worry 😃IMG_8971.jpeg
 
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