Becoming an adopting dad


Senior Moderator
Staff member
Senior Moderator
Becoming an adopting dad

Last year my wife and I made a decision to adopt a couple of girls, 10 and 15. It involved a lawyer, the state adoption agency and an FBI background check.

In our prayer time we asked God what He had to say about this. We're celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary this June 1, and after losing our son back in 1985 we never had children after that. So, it was a major decision for me. My wife took it with a stronger step of faith as I had reservations. I love our sense of independence in our marriage.

God was showing me that while my wife and I balanced the challenges with the feats she was leaning more towards the blessings of loving these girls, :dance: while I was focused on the woes of taking responsibility for them and, well, :badidea:

Late in the evening about a week ago I was in my prayer time and our Father popped His accomplishments in my head. During the past 4 months while the adoption agent held separate interview appointments with my wife, me and the girls, the state's reporting was good. The FBI completed their background and our history is clean. The grueling paperwork is almost complete.

It's all falling into place. Then the Lord took me a step further and revealed the core of His purpose. The girls have drawn closer to me, open up more and ask me questions about Jesus Christ and the Bible. They delight in going to church with us. They are bonding with the youth and teens. They are making straight A's in public school. Go figure. I couldn't say this last year.

I am learning that I was limiting myself, being incapable of being a dad. God is showing me that His plan is His plan, and should I be chosen it's not about me keeping score on my skills and talents, it's God's design to supply the tools that He will provide so that I may apply the Lord's will be done. At the end of the day, where is my heart with Him? His will?

God raised Moses in Exodus 3:11-12, 11 But Moses said to God, "Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?" 12 And God said, "I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you [a] will worship God on this mountain."

God raised Israel in Isaiah 41:8-10, 8 "But you, O Israel, my servant, Jacob, whom I have chosen, you descendants of Abraham my friend, 9 I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. 10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

God raised Timothy in 1 Timothy 3:1-5, 1Here is a trustworthy saying: If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task. 2Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. 5(If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church?) 12 A deacon must be the husband of but one wife and must manage his children and his household well. Verse 13 Those who have served well gain an excellent standing and great assurance in their faith in Christ Jesus.

This is new territory for my wife and me and she told me I will make a pretty good Dad. We know there will be hard work ahead in parenting. I choose God. We'll be going to court within a couple of months!

Mom and Dad, your advise and support will be appreciated and uplifting to us. Thank you.

Your brother in Christ Jesus.
You both will do just fine. Just remember to "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him; and he shall direct your paths." God placed these children with you and if you allow God to lead you, the both of you will do fine. You may have some turbulences while raising children as most parents do, but when you put God first and don't move ahead of Him; you will be able to overcome them all as a family.

God bless,

I've always felt that adoption would be in my future. That was even before I knew there were fertility issues in my future. Congratulations to you and your wife. I think it's an amazing thing that you are doing. Giving two kids a chance to know what a real family is all about.
Dear brothers and sisters;

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. The girls are wonderful and though at first they seemed standoffish with me, I have seen more closeness and good conversation. Yes, it will be another two months before we appear before court time.

Your brother in Christ Jesus.