Going To A New Church Tomorrow

I will be going to a Lutheran church tomorrow morning for the first time. My wife was there last week as she wanted to find a church where my MIL and I would feel comfortable going and would go to each week.

She thinks that my MIL and I will be very comfortable at Lutheran service as it closely resembles a Catholic service.

A couple weeks ago I tried a church with my wife that maze me very uncomfortable. While singing worship songs it looked like a rock concert complete with fog from a fog machine and moving lights. There were people waving around flags, people hopping up on stage doing interpretative dancing and others dancing up in front of the stage. Then after the pastor was done preaching be asked for people who would like to be prayed over/for and the were people falling over backwards (slain in the spirit).

My wife liked it over all, but then she prefers charismatic/Pentecostal services with signs of the Spirit working. She went back this past Wednesday to a woman's group meeting and is going back the service tonight.

My MIL and I prefer a reserved service. I don't mind contemporary Christian music during worship, but what I saw there was making me very uncomfortable. My MIL who has schizo-effective disorder would find it very uncomfortable as well.

I just wish that I could find a church that my whole family will go to every week, instead of two different churches. My wife will not attend the Lutheran church with us regularly. She only went last week because she wanted to find my MIL and I somewhere to attend. She will go October, 5 because she wants to bring our dog to be blessed, but she is not a fan of reserved services or traditional churches where there is no outward sign of the Holy Spirit working or guiding the service.

I don't think my family will ever call a church our church home where we all go and it's depressing.
 
Are there any here where you go to a different church than your spouse?

How do you handle learning different things than your spouse?

If I stick with the Lutheran church, it is the complete opposite spectrum from Pentecostalism. As it is, we already argue about different things in regards to our Christianity. She believes at times that I make her spiritually dead because I will not believe the same she does. I would never say that because I know that it is me, my choice to allow someone to make me feel spiritually dead.

My hearts desire is to have the family united under one church, no arguments taking place because we believe completely different things, worshipping together at the same church every week.

The more I think of it, the more I get depressed because I realize that in the close to six years of being a Christian, all of the above had never happened and probably will not happen unless I believe exactly as she does and go to the same church she wants to go to at all times.
 
I've never experienced this personally, though my wife is a Cradle Catholic while I'm a Convert -- we did have moments of disagreements in the past before we were married (though we're aligned today).

I was reading a book by a Catholic writer named Scott Hahn -- his book is called Rome Sweet Home, and it recounts his conversion story from Presbyterian pastor to Catholic apologist and theologian professor.

At the point in his story when he became a Catholic, his wife, Kimberly, who was a devout Presbyterian, daughter of a Presbyterian minister, granddaughter of a Presbyterian minister, etc. was really struggle with this divide they had. When they married, they were both entirely on the same page in regards to faith. Later on, he converted and she didn't. This put both of them in an odd place. Some ministers told her to consider divorcing him. One friend of theirs was invited over to try and revert Scott.

And while Kimberly was dealing with this, Scott was also trying to figure out how to approach this. He was trying to figure out whether to push her into looking into Catholicism. He went to his parish priest for advice and told him how tough this was on both of them. The priest reminded Scott that his home, his family, is the domestic church. It is where he has to begin showing the love of God before he can even think about going forward. And the first thing he was told to do was simply love his wife unconditionally, and to accept her entirely as she is.

The story went on and they each had their own conversion stories at different points of their life, but the point in this case is absolutely true. The very first place we are to show Jesus' love is at home. Always encourage your wife, always make her feel like she's your hero, accept her just as she is, even if you two don't agree, and to use the phrase, do what Jesus would do.
 
Are there any here where you go to a different church than your spouse?

How do you handle learning different things than your spouse?

If I stick with the Lutheran church, it is the complete opposite spectrum from Pentecostalism. As it is, we already argue about different things in regards to our Christianity. She believes at times that I make her spiritually dead because I will not believe the same she does. I would never say that because I know that it is me, my choice to allow someone to make me feel spiritually dead.

My hearts desire is to have the family united under one church, no arguments taking place because we believe completely different things, worshipping together at the same church every week.

The more I think of it, the more I get depressed because I realize that in the close to six years of being a Christian, all of the above had never happened and probably will not happen unless I believe exactly as she does and go to the same church she wants to go to at all times.

You have your wife's heart so you have her ear. If you have her ear you can share the truth with her.

You have obviously being lead to another place because of truth. Share that with her. If it has you convinced you should be able to convince her. Truth = truth.

I don't witness with you being at separate churches at all! It should never happen. You should both be praying / sharing scripture / truth together. You should both feel the same about the Lutheran church.
 
You have your wife's heart so you have her ear. If you have her ear you can share the truth with her.

You have obviously being lead to another place because of truth. Share that with her. If it has you convinced you should be able to convince her. Truth = truth.

I don't witness with you being at separate churches at all! It should never happen. You should both be praying / sharing scripture / truth together. You should both feel the same about the Lutheran church.

I have shared this with her, but my truth no longer matters to her. We are always hearing something different from Lord. Because my walk is different from hers in how we relate to God, she doesn't believe that I am walking with him at all. I am a very private person when it comes to my walk. I am not very vocal about it.

I also do not discuss scripture with her anymore. That is self preservation on my part. Tired of hearing how I am wrong and how she is right. So rather than hearing it constantly, I will not discuss scripture with her at all.

So I guess you can say that I go not have her ear anymore.

I am just going to go at it alone as well as quietly and hopefully when she sees that I am happy where I am, she may get curious and want to come along.
 
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