Good point! I should start living that more!
Honoring One's Parents
- Thread starter gracesteph
- Start date
Good point! I should start living that more!
Well, we all need to, really. The theme of love in John's Gospel and John's Epistles is inexhaustible. Blessings.
just set a certain day of the week to give her a call that way she doesn't feel cut off, if possible. I do know how you feel. my husbands mom gets upset if he pays more attention to me instead of her. she disrespects him, treats him like he is too young to understand things sometimes, and tells him what to do and how to go about things in life. its hard to honor someone who will not be honorable. I know we are to love, honor, and respect even in times when the person is less than. just do not let it come between you and your wife. do you have a sister? its usually girls who call their mothers everyday, if they are close to them. keep praying for her.
I know how you feel. my father was abusive to my mother and me (not so much my brothers). he still is its just not physical now, but they keep abusing each other, not to mention themselves with drugs and alcohol. I think both of my parents have undiagnosed mental problems. its hard to honor them when they are not acting honorable. just love them and let them know they are loved, even when they are unlovable. honoring them doesn't mean that you have to involve them in every part of your life, you do not have to look up to him as anything other than your earthly father. he does not have to be a role model, or the most influential person in your life, use him as an example of what you do not want yourself or your future husband to be. Use your life to Glorify God, and pray that He will lead you thru this and show you how to honor the unhonorable.
I know how you feel too, my father was abusive verbally and occasionally physically, but I was a rotten kid and deserved it, so most of the time I needed correction, just not to the degree it was meted out, ...when he died I didn't shed a tear, however, after being born again I struggled with the same commandment you are, a wise pastor showed me it was under the blood and to let it go, but then the Lord brought a father-in-law into my life to test me, this is what He taught me, ...as stated above, I'm to honor him and love him with the agape love of Christ, but that doesn't mean I have to like him, there were too many cultural, social and intellectual differences for us to hang together.
How did I do that, I gave to him the honor the Word says in the position of a father and a man older than me and in sacrificial love I went the extra mile to take care of his house, pay for his land and help out financially when needed, I not only talked the talk, I walked the walk, what happened is it convicted him, he went to church, claimed to know Jesus, but exhibited all the traits of an unsaved person, gradually he withdrew himself from my life, ...did it work, three days before he died he told his pastor he had accepted Jesus as his Savior and was at peace with dying.
Now there is something very important we must remember, God doesn't forgive anyone unless they come and ask Him for forgiveness, so He doesn't expect us to do something He Himself doesn't do, so there were many times I was angry and mad at his meddling in my marriage and he never came and apologized one single time, ...but if we keep that anger in our hearts a root of bitterness will spring up and that would only hurt us, so even though they never come and ask for forgiveness we need, in those angry times, to tell Father we are angry, forgive them, and ask Jesus to take the anger, however, that doesn't mean things are square between us and those that have offended us, they still need to make things right with us, but we have followed the Lord's command to forgive those that offend us, ...we aren't God who remembers sin no more, we can forgive someone and their actions can bring back to remembrance the past sins, just remember the others times you forgave them, just between you and Father, are under the blood and then deal with the latest offense, don't let the devil tell you are unworthy by reminding you of the previous times, ...we live one day at a time.
Hopefully your situation will turn out for the better with your father, hold hm up in prayer asking the Lord to show Him his life and need for salvation, so who knows beloved, I've heard of the Lord restoring families, here's hoping He will do that with yours.
Blessings,
Gene
How did I do that, I gave to him the honor the Word says in the position of a father and a man older than me and in sacrificial love I went the extra mile to take care of his house, pay for his land and help out financially when needed, I not only talked the talk, I walked the walk, what happened is it convicted him, he went to church, claimed to know Jesus, but exhibited all the traits of an unsaved person, gradually he withdrew himself from my life, ...did it work, three days before he died he told his pastor he had accepted Jesus as his Savior and was at peace with dying.
Now there is something very important we must remember, God doesn't forgive anyone unless they come and ask Him for forgiveness, so He doesn't expect us to do something He Himself doesn't do, so there were many times I was angry and mad at his meddling in my marriage and he never came and apologized one single time, ...but if we keep that anger in our hearts a root of bitterness will spring up and that would only hurt us, so even though they never come and ask for forgiveness we need, in those angry times, to tell Father we are angry, forgive them, and ask Jesus to take the anger, however, that doesn't mean things are square between us and those that have offended us, they still need to make things right with us, but we have followed the Lord's command to forgive those that offend us, ...we aren't God who remembers sin no more, we can forgive someone and their actions can bring back to remembrance the past sins, just remember the others times you forgave them, just between you and Father, are under the blood and then deal with the latest offense, don't let the devil tell you are unworthy by reminding you of the previous times, ...we live one day at a time.
Hopefully your situation will turn out for the better with your father, hold hm up in prayer asking the Lord to show Him his life and need for salvation, so who knows beloved, I've heard of the Lord restoring families, here's hoping He will do that with yours.
Blessings,
Gene
rev3lations
Inactive
Everytime I see your photo I get the feeling that you are a very warm person, I am just saying thats all.
Thank you for your response.
I do not have any sisters, at least not sisters in the sense that my mom birthed or adopted them. I have half sisters on my father's side that I never knew about till two years ago when one of them contacted me. My mom and dad are divorced and she left him when I was 3 months old. I have never met him.
I was beaten up by my pops regularly until age 26-27? The worst feeling ever. I'd rather get punched by mike Tyson than my dad because of the emotional pain. He's dead now and I've had a decade plus years away from it all. Honoring your parents is not obeying them especially when they're nut jobs. Honoring means looking after them when they turn docile and can't take care of themselves. Just try and realize a point about forgiveness, it requires suffering the debt created by your father. He owes you and your family a debt that cannot be paid with money but can only be paid with humility and sincere apology. If he is unwilling to pay that debt then you and your mom have been paying that debt by bearing the suffering caused by it. To truly forgive him you must say "I will pay that debt and I forgive you". That means never bringing it up again with mom or anyone else. That is true forgiveness. It's what Christ did for you and me, he bore our debt, he said I will forgive you. I didn't understand this when my dad was alive and thus never really showed him forgiveness. You still have to be careful of your dad tho even if you choose to forgive him. Stand up to him on the basis of your relationship with Jesus Christ and do not allow him to lead you astray.