Husband's are head of household

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pinkblue

Husband's are head of household

Question... My husband suffer from a traumatic brain injury. He is able to walk, talk, and so forth.. It happen ten years ago. However he has short term mermory, reading difficulties, mood swings, speaking out of subject and problem solving etc. Each year it seem's the problems are getting difficult. He is unable to keep jobs because of constant seizures. So he usually gets fired. He does not want to share with his christain brothers or sister regarding his difficulties. Between my six year old daughter and him. I am constantly drained. I feel alone and guilty because sometimes I feel I should take the lead in the household as head because of his difficulties. I feel embrass because my fellow christain brothers dont know his condition and may judge me as not a real professing christain wife because constantly I am driving us around or constanly speak up for him. Should I take the lead in my family ( do the husband role of making decision ? or leave it up to my husband who has these difficulties? What would jesus want me to do? what is my family life lesson?
 
Though the King James Version Bible does state that the 'man' is the head of the household, we must look at that translation and take those words back to the Original Manuscripts for a clearer understanding. When those texts were written, it was the norm of the day to have the man as the strong protector of the family and who made the important decisions. However, we know that there were many women in biblical history who were the leaders of family, business, education and society such as Hulda, the primary teacher and 'seer' (prophet) at the University.

We are also told in 1 Timothy 5:8 (KJV) ALL - repeat ALL of us are responsible for our families:

1 Timothy 5:8 (KJV), "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel."

In other words, we ALL must provide for the spiritual and material needs of our families no matter who we are.

We are also told in Romans 13: 1-14 (KJV) that we are to obey the laws of government - and THAT includes both Criminal Law and Civil Law from which our United States Constitition is based. We ALL must take the responsibility to protect, provide for and comfort our family. No Christian should feel second class just because of gender. God created ALL of us as equals and along with that goes EQUAL RESPONSIBILITY within the family.

God's Blessings to you and the family...
 
pinkblue said:
Question... My husband suffer from a traumatic brain injury. He is able to walk, talk, and so forth.. It happen ten years ago. However he has short term mermory, reading difficulties, mood swings, speaking out of subject and problem solving etc. Each year it seem's the problems are getting difficult. He is unable to keep jobs because of constant seizures. So he usually gets fired. He does not want to share with his christain brothers or sister regarding his difficulties. Between my six year old daughter and him. I am constantly drained. I feel alone and guilty because sometimes I feel I should take the lead in the household as head because of his difficulties. I feel embrass because my fellow christain brothers dont know his condition and may judge me as not a real professing christain wife because constantly I am driving us around or constanly speak up for him. Should I take the lead in my family ( do the husband role of making decision ? or leave it up to my husband who has these difficulties? What would jesus want me to do? what is my family life lesson?
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Read Proverbs 31, 10 -31!!!

Do not be afraid to do what is right.
You are doing what the Lord intended. Leadership in the home is not a birth right or position. It is not gender specific. It is a biblical presept. A guideline for the normal situation. However, yours is not the normal situation. You bring glory to God and bessings all that surround you in that you protect and provide for your husband ,marriage and family. God saves not from our difficulties ,but through them.

To those that ask and show concern, explain your situation. To those who judge without discernment of situation? Pray for them.
The problem is their's not yours.

God Bless you and yours
Cliff
 
pinkblue said:
Question... My husband suffer from a traumatic brain injury. He is able to walk, talk, and so forth.. It happen ten years ago. However he has short term mermory, reading difficulties, mood swings, speaking out of subject and problem solving etc. Each year it seem's the problems are getting difficult. He is unable to keep jobs because of constant seizures. So he usually gets fired. He does not want to share with his christain brothers or sister regarding his difficulties. Between my six year old daughter and him. I am constantly drained. I feel alone and guilty because sometimes I feel I should take the lead in the household as head because of his difficulties. I feel embrass because my fellow christain brothers dont know his condition and may judge me as not a real professing christain wife because constantly I am driving us around or constanly speak up for him. Should I take the lead in my family ( do the husband role of making decision ? or leave it up to my husband who has these difficulties? What would jesus want me to do? what is my family life lesson?
Click to expand...

Hello pinkblue,
They answer is yes he needs to be head as scripture declairs. Don't fall for this stuff that scripture is limited to time and culture. Here is my suggestion. Do all that you can to honor the headship of your husband. Pray for him and let him know that you are and that you stand with him, seek advice from him as much as he can offer or will offer, showing your trust in him, and above all trust the Lord. This does not mean that if he is so disabled that you do things that you know are harmfull or sinful any more then if he were not disabled and telling you to do things sinful. Do all you can to follow the scripture. Do not use any liberty for an oppertunity to sin. Yet do not sin to follow the letter of scripture. Remember the letter kills but the spirit gives life.
What you are going to have to do is be a spirit filled woman, relying heavily on the Lord. Seek Him for wisdom and strength. Also one more thing. I really suuggest that you mmight go to the deacons and thhe pastor and tell them about your husbands problem. Ask for prayer and consideration as he has a handicap.
I do have some information on my web site that may be of benifit to you and him.
God bless :)
 
If his disability hinders him from making the everyday household decisions a male-head-of-the-house needs to make in order for your family to thrive, then perhaps you should take up some of those responsibilities. If his disability is keeping him from supporting his family, then you should take some of the burdens (and I know you do, most men don't do much more than go to work and relax afterwards, not helping with dishes, laundry, the mail, cooking, cleaning or much else. If men have always been the head of the household, they've done a bad job of showing it by giving women all of the dometic responsibility.)

thing is, if you're taking the lion's share of the responsibility in the house, then by all means, you are the head of the house, but you didn't choose it, it was thrown into your lap. Dont fear if this is what happened.

Make the right choice you feel is best for your family.
 
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