Lies to Tell Little Kids
I went to a bookstore last night and was browsing when I found a book by Andy something-or-other called Lies to Tell Little Kids.
I was angry!
Then I opened the book...here's some of the things that I can remember...
- All birds wear little parachutes just in case they forget how to fly.
- A new sun goes over every day. See that hill? There's a bunch of old suns over that hill. When they cool, people cut them up into blocks and that's where we get margarine.
- [kid looking into an empty bottle]. Dad tells him: You know, there used to be a ship in that bottle...but it sank.
- If you say a prayer before you go to sleep, set up a rabbit trap...in the morning you'll have your own little angel to keep as a pet!
- Scatter some tacks around an ant hill because they use them for umbrellas when it's raining.
- Of course you didn't see any ghosts while we were back at the castle...they were all on their cigarette breaks!
- Fish can send text messages...drop mommy's cell phone in the fish bowl and you'll see.
- Clowns melt at 86-degrees. [shows a picture of a clown-puddle]
- [Picture of a square] This square has a hidden fifth side that you can only see if you stare at it for a very, very, very long time...
- All wind comes from wind farms.
It's a cute book...of course, it's meant as humor. At the end of the book, the author tells you that it's not nice to fib.
Check it out! Had me laughing.
I went to a bookstore last night and was browsing when I found a book by Andy something-or-other called Lies to Tell Little Kids.
I was angry!
Then I opened the book...here's some of the things that I can remember...
- All birds wear little parachutes just in case they forget how to fly.
- A new sun goes over every day. See that hill? There's a bunch of old suns over that hill. When they cool, people cut them up into blocks and that's where we get margarine.
- [kid looking into an empty bottle]. Dad tells him: You know, there used to be a ship in that bottle...but it sank.
- If you say a prayer before you go to sleep, set up a rabbit trap...in the morning you'll have your own little angel to keep as a pet!
- Scatter some tacks around an ant hill because they use them for umbrellas when it's raining.
- Of course you didn't see any ghosts while we were back at the castle...they were all on their cigarette breaks!
- Fish can send text messages...drop mommy's cell phone in the fish bowl and you'll see.
- Clowns melt at 86-degrees. [shows a picture of a clown-puddle]
- [Picture of a square] This square has a hidden fifth side that you can only see if you stare at it for a very, very, very long time...
- All wind comes from wind farms.
It's a cute book...of course, it's meant as humor. At the end of the book, the author tells you that it's not nice to fib.
Check it out! Had me laughing.