Of the nine "fruits of the Spirit" listed in Galatians 5, the first of all is love. And because the unchanging Holy Spirit is its source - the same Holy Spirit who dwells in the hearts of all believers - then the love He creates in you is unchanging as well. It is based on the will of God, the calling of God, and the Word of God - all unchanging things. The Bible declares them "irrevocable" (Romans 11:29).
Seeing marriage as a contract is like saying to your spouse, "I take you for me and we'll see if this works out." But realizing it as a covenant changes it to say, "I give myself to you and commit to this marriage for life."
Because our hearts are so subject to change and so utterly untrustworthy, the Scriptures communicate a much stronger message than "follow your heart." The Bible instructs you to lead your heart. This means to take full responsibility for its condition and direction. Realize that you do have control over where your heart is. You have been given the power by God to take your heart off one thing and to set it on something else.
Patience makes us wise. Patience stands in the doorway where anger is clawing to burst in, but waits to see the whole picture before passing judgment.
Love requires thoughtfulness - on both sides - the kind that builds bridges through the constructive combnation of patience, kindness, and selflessness. Love teaches you how to meet in the middle, to respect and appreciate how your spouse uniquely thinks.
Love is not Rude: To be rude is to act unbecoming, embarrassing, or irritating. In marriage, this could be a foul mouth, poor table manners, or a habit of making sarcastic quips. However you look at it, no one enjoys being around a rude person.
Love is Not Irritable: Everyone has unresolved issues, hurts, and personal baggage. We have all sinned. But we have this unfortunate tendency to downplay our own negative attributes while putting our partner's failure s under a magnifying glass.
Your spouse is a living, breathing, endless book to be read. Dreams and hopes have yet to be realized. Talents and abilities may be discovered like hidden treasure. But the choice to explore them starts with a decision by you.
Love is Not Jealous: Jealous is sparked when someone else upstages you and gets something you want. This can be very painful depending upon how selfish you are. Instead of congratulating them, you fume in anger and think ill of them.
Think back to the story of Jesus told of the prodigal son. Of all the scenarios this young man had played out in his mind, this was likely the last one he expected. But how do you think it made him feel to receive his father's embrace and hear his thankful tone? He no doubt felt loved and treasured once again. What do you think it did in their relationship? What kind of greetings would make your mate feel like that? (see Luke 15:11-32)
Unconditional love is "in sickness and health" love, "for richer or poorer" love, "for better or worse" love. It is the only kind of love that is true love.
