Need advice dealing with my feelings

I am an adult, and in need of a parent,just to let you know where I am coming from. I am 35, have no dad(died when I was 19) , and my mom does not love me. My relationship with my mother is basically hi how are you, like with a stranger. My heart cries out for that relationship, yet there is nothing I can do if she is not willing. It hurts so bad. I live for God, she does not. I have done all I can, as a christian. I even tried to ask her if she could just look at her children like the little baby she gave birth to and love them all. I won't try to tell you what to do, but as a christian, you might have the answer in your heart, but just feel like you can't do it. I would rather my heart be healed by my mom faking it than to live like this.I could never imagine myself in a situation like that but even if I just had to put on an act, I would do everything in my power to make them feel loved and take away that pain. Here is what I miss out on.:
I would love to have my dad take me to lunch.
I would love my mom to have concern for me. Just to see how I am.
I would love a note (or email to brighten my day)
A hug. a compliment or 2.
these are just simple little things, but they can change a life.
 
archibaldbc said:
Here is what I miss out on.:
I would love to have my dad take me to lunch.
I would love my mom to have concern for me. Just to see how I am.
I would love a note (or email to brighten my day)
A hug. a compliment or 2.
these are just simple little things, but they can change a life.
Click to expand...

Your post touched me deeply. In some ways your and my testemony are simular. God blessed me with a mother that new no limit to her love for us..Our father however was always distant and uncaring.
I notice in another thread that you have 3? Children. You probibly already know this but I'll say it any way.
Treat them as you would have wanted and needed your mother to be tward you. Then watch their faces as they display the joy for you that you missed.
The love of ones children is a blessing and medicine for the sorrows of our own childhoods. And Grand children are even greater because you don't have to change their diapers ;)
 
archibaldbc- I can sense the pain in your words and my heart is moved for you- I am lifting you up in prayer- one thing we know for certain, no matter who else disapoints us our heavenly Father never will
 
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