No you can't

Lanolin

Lanolin

Have you ever had an instance where your family just tells you you can't do something.
And it's not something illegal or anything.
It's just they don't want you to do it. It could be your dream, or something you want to try, or a job, or a hobby or to travel or something you have your heart set on that you think you could do that nobody else has ever done.

Why do family members do this?

I have never thought it a good idea to quash someone's dreams. This is why some people keep their mouths shut and don't tell their families anything.
 
Lanolin said:
Have you ever had an instance where your family just tells you you can't do something.
And it's not something illegal or anything.
It's just they don't want you to do it. It could be your dream, or something you want to try, or a job, or a hobby or to travel or something you have your heart set on that you think you could do that nobody else has ever done.

Why do family members do this?

I have never thought it a good idea to quash someone's dreams. This is why some people keep their mouths shut and don't tell their families anything.
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Sometimes they are meddling, sometimes they are providing a different perspective.

My sons are fully adults now ( 39 & 40 yrs old ) and I still give them advice. Sometimes I say they 'can't' do something when what I mean is that something to their detriment is likely to happen if they do.

As adults, they make their own decisions. I don't take it as personal assault when they do not choose what I advise.
 
Do you also find that their ideas are sometimes better than yours lol?
I appreciate interaction and advice from my kids, although sometimes I don't agree and they are good with that.
I think the only real advantage we have over our 'smarter' kids is character, something developed with time and experience, not necessarily tied to intelligence.
Character (in part) the realization of who and what we are, fallible and egocentric - but the willingness to be corrected.
 
haha not really, families often don't have any idea at all (let alone better ones) - to someone who has ideas all the time!

Besides, if it's that persons dream but the other persons nightmare, they don't actually have to be involved with it or help in anyway. Because the person with the idea would be doing it not the other person. It's their life.

For example, if I wanted to get married and have a huge family and my sister didn't, she'll tell me I can't for HER reasons not mine. It's not like she's a doctor and can say..well if you get married and have a huge family you'll die in childbirth.
 
OK
I guess I was shooting from the hip and missed the mark.
True, we all have reasons but reasoning doesn't always steer in the right direction.
I love family, and what you give is usually what you get. So keep being loveable (the right kind) and have a large family lol.
 
I live with my son and his family. He's business-minded, like his mother. Me, I'm a musician. He sometimes thinks he's my manager. Lol!
"Dad, play, 'Wish You Were Here!'" To him, that's a spiritual song. He's not fond of this hallelujah stuff. I used to be a worship leader...at heart, I still am!
"Faithful One, so unchanging, ageless One, You're my Rock of peace, Lord of all, I depend on You, and I call out to You again and again..."
Now that's a classic!
 
Lanolin said:
Have you ever had an instance where your family just tells you you can't do something.
And it's not something illegal or anything.
It's just they don't want you to do it. It could be your dream, or something you want to try, or a job, or a hobby or to travel or something you have your heart set on that you think you could do that nobody else has ever done.

Why do family members do this?

I have never thought it a good idea to quash someone's dreams. This is why some people keep their mouths shut and don't tell their families anything.
Click to expand...

Hey Lanolin;

Interesting thread No you can't. I have two different responses to that.

Many times my late Mom would tell me, "I couldn't do something" or "No, you can't!" is because she was controlling when she put her foot down with me. I would ask her, "why?" and she would respond, "because I said so!"

Yikes! I went through this for 19 years of my life until I moved out...at 19. lol!

My Mom was loving and thoughtful, but she had a temper for controlling her children. I learned something from this growing up. I can be suggestive, objective but will not control the outcome of what others choose to say or do.

Like give their opinion at Christian Forum Site. L😎L!
 
Lanolin said:
Have you ever had an instance where your family just tells you you can't do something.
And it's not something illegal or anything.
It's just they don't want you to do it. It could be your dream, or something you want to try, or a job, or a hobby or to travel or something you have your heart set on that you think you could do that nobody else has ever done.

Why do family members do this?

I have never thought it a good idea to quash someone's dreams. This is why some people keep their mouths shut and don't tell their families anything.
Click to expand...
My family is the opposite, they want me to chase all of my dreams, but unfortunately because of my spiritual / mental situation, I cannot do the things that I want to do.

I do however get a lot of free time to research whatever I want on the internet. :p
 
bobinfaith said:
Hey Lanolin;

Interesting thread No you can't. I have two different responses to that.

Many times my late Mom would tell me, "I couldn't do something" or "No, you can't!" is because she was controlling when she put her foot down with me. I would ask her, "why?" and she would respond, "because I said so!"

Yikes! I went through this for 19 years of my life until I moved out...at 19. lol!

My Mom was loving and thoughtful, but she had a temper for controlling her children. I learned something from this growing up. I can be suggestive, objective but will not control the outcome of what others choose to say or do.

Like give their opinion at Christian Forum Site. L😎L!
Click to expand...
Aw I wonder if you were a handful when young Bob!

I think a lot of mothers don't really like their children growing up. They prefer them smaller and portable and preferably sleeping.
 
crossnote said:
God won't set a low bar but...
I'm glad Jesus already vaulted over the bars before me.
He won the Marathon of Life in my stead.
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I know God wont set a low bar, haha.

I just meant that if I lower my expectations for what I think I should get out of this life, then I will be a happier person.

It's hard to go from functioning 100% to barely being able to function altogether.
 
Foundsheep said:
I know God wont set a low bar, haha.

I just meant that if I lower my expectations for what I think I should get out of this life, then I will be a happier person.

It's hard to go from functioning 100% to barely being able to function altogether.
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I know of only One Person who functioned 100%.
I wouldn't be so hard on yourself.
 
When I was depressed, getting out of bed was a feat. lol

I think the best thing to do is take one day at a time when you think it's all a bit too much. Put one foot in front of the other, and then you'll find yourself walking further in the direction you are going, and making progress from the day before. Baby steps right?

I do believe one day we will be able to fly (and not just by aeroplane) because, well, why not? The Bible has this promise.

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 (KJV)
 
Lanolin said:
Have you ever had an instance where your family just tells you you can't do something.
And it's not something illegal or anything.
It's just they don't want you to do it. It could be your dream, or something you want to try, or a job, or a hobby or to travel or something you have your heart set on that you think you could do that nobody else has ever done.

Why do family members do this?

I have never thought it a good idea to quash someone's dreams. This is why some people keep their mouths shut and don't tell their families anything.
Click to expand...
Many times. It only further drove my drive to do it even more. I have many certifications I have graduated from. I had many businesses I created for myself [I had to discontinue one due to my health and restarted another]. I am a typical type A personality. I owned a horse, I trained service dogs, did life coaching, certified trauma specialist, did my own custom sewing products and embroidery, I did professional photography. I had my art send all over the world [paid and custom] and contiuned to do all the things that people said I couldn't do.

I just say well, we will see what God says ;) LOL

So the best thing is to sit back and keep your mouth shut. Really you have absolutely no idea what God is going to do! When we start to say [I mean family, friends etc] things like that or others - they are infact playing god.
 
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