Parenting Thoughts?

Hi everyone, it's been awhile since I've posted on the site, but it's the first place I thought to turn for this question.

My wife and I have been having a lot of trouble with our 3 year old daughter. She has become extremely disrespectful and disobedient and no punishment seems to be working for her. She constantly gets into things she's been told not to touch, and cries when she doesn't get her own way...usually stating "But I have to cry!". We've tried spankings and losing privileges, we've tried distractions, and including her in more things that we do throughout the day. Does anyone have any thoughts?

Thanks in advance!
Sorry. I know it can be frustrating. The rule of thumb is: consequences change behavior. Nagging is not a consequence. The trick is to find a consequence that matters to them.
Be firm with love. My son was difficult at 3 but a joy after that when he learned some discipline and respect. The golden age lasted till he became a teenager, he is still a good kid but there are a whole new set of challenges.


Sr Mod/Webmaster
Staff member
Senior Moderator
Every parent has had that moment with their child where duct tape started sounding less and less like child abuse and more and more like sound parenting. The good news is that at 3, you've got tons of time to fix it. The bad news is, you also have tons of time to make the wrong choices. It's all a bit of experimentation until you find what works for you and your child.
She's only 3, I think it might be just a stage she is going through. There is plenty of parenting books, that talk about the stages children go through. I haven't read any of them, but I've listened briefly to discussions people have had on the subject. What I've heard is positive reinforcement can be an affective method.

Also, how much sleep is she getting? The amount of sleep the child is getting will also have a major impact on the child's mood and behavior.
After communications were established I never spanked my kids, I spoke to them eye to eye, and gave them time outs until the Spirit said to release them. Schedules are vital until they can better handle the chaos of life. Remember they are people too dealing with new emotions and the world around them. But most importantly is to pray over them, spend time with them in the things THEY like to do. Sit and have a tea party and spend quality time. She's only craving attention. By any chance, do you do day-care?
I guess the OP have vanished completely! But still, this thread could be useful for many! My kid is now 2.5 years old.. She is going into that state now.. I am hoping this is only for a temporary season.. These are the things we are trying,

Show her more love and spend more time with her. When we do that, she seems to be more receptive of corrections
When she is totally out of control, induce fear through timeout :)
Thinking of putting her in school during summer
2-3 years old are the years in which their personality is born. If not corrected during the growing process issues will manifest ten fold in their teens. I have three wonderful kids ages 21, 18 and 17. Time-outs work and later removing things they like - computers, game boy (pre-iPad :D), and making them write a report(!) my favorite, on the subject that was offended upon. If they lie, why lying is wrong and why it's painful to others. We watch TV together, and I never used it as a babysitter. They were limited in the amount too. Today, not one watches any TV and rarely do we go to any movies... we wait until they come to Netflix and watch together in our home. Then we discuss the movie on whether it was informative, useful, good acting, bad writing, whatever. Even the subject matter. I'm going to really miss them when they go on with their own lives.