I would like to share with you that when I got here last October... I had just been eternally banned from a different site. HAHA.
I had completely lost hope in finding a good forum where Christianity was actually practiced. I first joined a Christian forum during the time prior to the 2020 US election and between that and the fighting regarding doctrine... I was like a cat backed up in a corner. It was AWFUL. I completely lost my respect for Christians.... and I thought Christian Unity was a MYTH.
When I joined here last October... I had little to no hope that I would even last a week. I was warmly welcomed... and then... I started sharing from my heart... and before I knew it... some members came along side of me in prayer and compassionate support. I went from that cat with its' back up to now... being able to REST in TRUST that I have a home here.
This place is my church... and some people don't like when I say this... but God knows my heart and my situation. Church in Canada is NO where near what church in America is. I envy those small little congregations that truly understand what discipleship means and what teaching good solid biblical truth means.
The staff here.... oh my goodness... let me tell you about the staff here.... they are truly dedicated to making this a safe and Christian place.
It took many months for me to truly surrender and completely trust that when ISSUES arise ( and they sometimes do ) that staff are right on it... and they all work to resolve any conflicts that occur.... not only that... respect and dignity is given to each and every person here. Issues are prayed about and I have on several occasions received some AWESOME Godly counsel from several staff members... when I have struggled with an "attitude" about something. HA.
Now... I am relaxed... and totally at peace here. I am just ME... and that is a wonderful thing.
I sound like a paid advertisement. HAHAHAHA... I assure you that my words are sincere and come from my heart.
It is much quieter than most forums... and that does take a bit of time to get used to... but the fellowship is worth it's weight in GOLD.
So there you have it... the little black sheep of the family has SPOKEN. HAHA.
Thank You so much for sharing this.
Funny but I really needed to hear this. I do not think I have been banned yet anywhere. I did ask the last group to do that privately.
As the settings made it hard to remove notifications.
I joined a small church in 2004. It was a place God was present in all his grace. The church was and old two story 1950's office building.
There was a lawyers office down stairs it held about 75-100 ppl. There was a local mission and the less fortunate area of town.
There was a 1930 hotel that many stayed that came there. It was not a shirt and tie. But jeans sneakers and a sweatshirt kind place.
My wife and I did not like the larger ones and heard about this place. It start was in the Highschool Auditorium on Sundays and they had this place like two years. The people there, had very little money, some even had pajamas. But no one cared. But the Lord was there as bright as the sun. I could see it in all of them. This would become my home. Having been homeless myself before I could care less about a persons appearance. This place was blessed. There was a moose lodge on the other side of town. That sold and the church I was at bought the land.
This was truly a gift from God I thought. We would all volunteer to help build it. I tried to give all my free time to it. As we still were downtown we would build this for two years. I have a Commercial Driver License and the Church had a bus. I knew this was too far for all those ppl downtown to get to as most walked to service now. I thought, I could pick them up. Bus held like 40 people and drop them off I went to the elders, I thought how amazing this would be, as I shared with them, this idea of how we could lift these people up that helped build it.
I actually was pretty hyped up about it. The reply was No. I clarified by reintroducing, if it was cost I would cover the fuel, even help with insurance if needed. As I figured that would be and issue. Just building this very nice building we did all sorts of fund raising to do it. So being I was doing pretty good financially. I would give my time and money and that would be the end of it.
The answer was a unanimous no. I think I felt my soul drop 6 feet and hit the ground. I tried not to show my contempt and anger.
I didn't understand. These were the people we want. Those who follow Jesus and give what little they could. These people many lived on disability would give every Sunday and I was hollow. This place had a massive 40ft stage, sound system, new chairs, and there was now room for Sunday schools and a Nursery. My wife would volunteer there. My in laws donated a 4K latte machines from their business.
This seemed a answer of prayers to grow, and share Gods Greatness and Grace. I was empty. I mean, desert no water empty.
I have seen satan followers do such deeds in my life. The Church became a upscale place. It began bringing many well to do members.
They would have their Sunday Bests. They were very prominent people in this new church. Allot of influenceable people.
No jeans, no sweat shirts or tshirts. I did not lose my faith in Jesus that day. I did lose faith in Organized groups.
I was a pastors and then became one with no home. We would leave after struggling, as we watched clicks and special groups developed.
The elders would soon forbid member to meet outside of church approved events, meetings etc. So our Growth and mens groups became dictated and controlled. This is not the largest church in the who county. I would go on to work as a supervisor at a drug and alcohol treatment center. Where I saw pain filled souls. It was so nice to there and see people come to Christ. It was a Christ based recovery. Until they changed board members and HR would forbid Christian activities. I was threated to be fire if I did not stop discussing the Lord. So I left I could not afford to lose my job two kids and a family to feed. So I left I would not allow evil to dictate where I spoke with the Lord. The HR person was a leader in a local church as well. At this point in a span of ten years I am in a place where I do not trust Christians. I know a bold statement. But I was beyond sad, and beyond disgusted.
I would then now, Id guess 6 years or so looking for a group I can fit in. Id look at other churches and find the exact same thing.
It was if I was a magnet to see all those I felt were failing Gods people. I say felt, because how would I know. It just felt that way.
I am directly honest when I say. I need to ground soon. This pain has been just now 20 years trying to find peace within the communities.
I am not 61 soon 62. I left the know often, I am tired. I keep seeing pain, and the darkness in so many people. Then a little over a month
things would change. I am now in the middle of this as we speak. Unsure where it is going. But I need to ground my self. I am already well rooted with in God. I think I am steady. But this is new. Something seems much darker. And it worries me. So again I pray this is a place.
As something is taking place. Maybe its just me locally, or worldly. I am unsure as the path so far seems illusive.
The Holy Spirit is amazing, I am so grateful.
But this is why I am here. I truly enjoyed hearing your path, thank you.
B 