The frugal farmer...


A farmer from Donegal sadly lost his wife..

He contacted the Donegal Post to arrange an obituary. The couple had been happily married for 50 years before she passed away.

The farmer went to the newspaper office to make the arrangements. When informed of the cost, the man uttered, in true rural fashion, “ Ow Much? ”
“Ah want summat simple” he explained, “My Gladys were a gud ‘arted an’ ‘ard-workin’ Donegal lass but she wunt av wanted owt swanky.”

“Perhaps a small poem”, suggested the woman at the desk.

“Nay”, he said, “she wunt av wanted owt la-di-da. Just put, ‘Gladys Breathwaithe died’”.

“You need to say when”, he was told by the receptionist.

“Do I? Well, put died 17th March. That'll do”.

“It is usual for the bereaved to add some meaningful phrase about the dearly departed”.

The man considered for a moment. “Well, put in, ‘Sadly missed’. That'll do”, he said.

“You can have another four words”, the woman explained.

“No, no”, he cried, “she wouldn' av wanted me to splash out”.

“The words are included in the standard price”, the woman informed him.

“Ah they? Tha means av paid for 'em?”.

“Yes, indeed sir”.

“Well, if av paid for 'em , am 'avin ‘em”

The obituary was duly printed as follows:

Gladys Breathwaithe died, 17th March. Sadly missed. Also tractor for sale.