Very long post - Need advice
To start this post, I will give a short background of myself. Also, I will give a very short summary on what I will be talking about since the post is very long. Basically I just got out of a relationship with a non-Christian in Feb. My walk with God has been stronger since then, but then there are things which are still bothering me and holding me back. Also, a recent event happened which basically ends all communication between me and her. My life has a lot of potential to be better, but the thoughts of that recent event has been disturbing me lately and I have exams on Monday and a lot of cover.
Now to start with the long version and a background of myself.
I was born into a Christian home. I'm a 4th generation Christian, my father being 3rd and mother being 1st. Supposedly baptised as a baby.
Basically, in my mid to high teen life, I've started enjoying the attentions of girls and started getting into relationships, in which all are with a non-Christian girl, and at the same time slowly moved away from God and his words.
Recently in February, my relationship of 2 years with this girl ended. It has come at a crucial time as the current semester I was about to undertake is important. I can not fail anything or else I would get in trouble from the University. We were still close friends after the breakup, but then one night she snapped (end March) and that's when things started turning sour with her.
To keep things simple, I have tried to play my role as much as possible since after the breakup and a major fight. Of course during the height of frustration (she can be very annoying and frustrating to communicate, especially since its a Long Distance Relationship) I have said some things that upset her, but when I look at it, she has done much more to me to really upset me first. Anyway, that is not why I am here for, but just to give a background so that you guys know what I am going through.
After the fight, she was like saying how she's not angry anymore, has forgiven me and stuff like that. But for the past 3 months, she has been treating me less than a friend (a big contrast to what she said to start with). I have not been communicating with her often so that to give her her own personal space, but even then, when I do communicate, she ignores me.
Anyway, I finally called her yesterday and to my surprise was the events that followed right after. Basically, she passed her phone to her friends at college, and they were all mocking me, pretending to be someone else, each one of them taking turn. All I wanted was to speak to her and find out what is wrong or what have I done, but I get this treatment.
The friends would insult me and scold me in various languages (Malaysia, multi language country) and well, I was totally appalled by the event. It came to me as a very big shock as I have been giving her space and not done anything for so long to upset her, yet this happened.
For now, I just want to focus on my upcoming examination, but the thoughts of this event keeps on reminiscing in my mind and I feel really hurt. At times from thinking about it, I feel very upset and angry. I mean I can't believe she was so immature to had done that and her friends as well were all acting like a bunch of kids... But what can you expect, I'm 22 and she'll be 19 soon. She's studying Fashion Designing and all her friends are non-Christians as well and are into the world.
As for my walk with God, the breakup is the best thing to had happened. I've realised a lot of things since then. Previously I would rely on my GFs for comfort and all, but it has only turned things sour (my ex was a very self centered person, 90% of the time when we spoke, it's about her. She has never taken any interest in what I do or how I am). I have been close to God in the sense that I've been reading his words everyday (http://www.rbc.org/odb/odb.shtml - Our Daily Bread) and praying to him often, like having a relationship with him. In the past 2-3 months, I have felt his presence more than I ever had my entire life before the breakup/fight.
Objectively, my life is in a much better position without her, but then I just feel really hurt. The events between me and her in the last 3+ months shows me a totally new person, separate from the person she was when the relationship first started. She has been doing this fashion stuff since Jan last year. I have put a lot of my life and effort into her, and basically I am really hurt deep within me. Anyway, I think I will stop at here and wait for some response before yakking any further.
Thanks in advance for your time and help,
- Raymond
To start this post, I will give a short background of myself. Also, I will give a very short summary on what I will be talking about since the post is very long. Basically I just got out of a relationship with a non-Christian in Feb. My walk with God has been stronger since then, but then there are things which are still bothering me and holding me back. Also, a recent event happened which basically ends all communication between me and her. My life has a lot of potential to be better, but the thoughts of that recent event has been disturbing me lately and I have exams on Monday and a lot of cover.
Now to start with the long version and a background of myself.
I was born into a Christian home. I'm a 4th generation Christian, my father being 3rd and mother being 1st. Supposedly baptised as a baby.
Basically, in my mid to high teen life, I've started enjoying the attentions of girls and started getting into relationships, in which all are with a non-Christian girl, and at the same time slowly moved away from God and his words.
Recently in February, my relationship of 2 years with this girl ended. It has come at a crucial time as the current semester I was about to undertake is important. I can not fail anything or else I would get in trouble from the University. We were still close friends after the breakup, but then one night she snapped (end March) and that's when things started turning sour with her.
To keep things simple, I have tried to play my role as much as possible since after the breakup and a major fight. Of course during the height of frustration (she can be very annoying and frustrating to communicate, especially since its a Long Distance Relationship) I have said some things that upset her, but when I look at it, she has done much more to me to really upset me first. Anyway, that is not why I am here for, but just to give a background so that you guys know what I am going through.
After the fight, she was like saying how she's not angry anymore, has forgiven me and stuff like that. But for the past 3 months, she has been treating me less than a friend (a big contrast to what she said to start with). I have not been communicating with her often so that to give her her own personal space, but even then, when I do communicate, she ignores me.
Anyway, I finally called her yesterday and to my surprise was the events that followed right after. Basically, she passed her phone to her friends at college, and they were all mocking me, pretending to be someone else, each one of them taking turn. All I wanted was to speak to her and find out what is wrong or what have I done, but I get this treatment.
The friends would insult me and scold me in various languages (Malaysia, multi language country) and well, I was totally appalled by the event. It came to me as a very big shock as I have been giving her space and not done anything for so long to upset her, yet this happened.
For now, I just want to focus on my upcoming examination, but the thoughts of this event keeps on reminiscing in my mind and I feel really hurt. At times from thinking about it, I feel very upset and angry. I mean I can't believe she was so immature to had done that and her friends as well were all acting like a bunch of kids... But what can you expect, I'm 22 and she'll be 19 soon. She's studying Fashion Designing and all her friends are non-Christians as well and are into the world.
As for my walk with God, the breakup is the best thing to had happened. I've realised a lot of things since then. Previously I would rely on my GFs for comfort and all, but it has only turned things sour (my ex was a very self centered person, 90% of the time when we spoke, it's about her. She has never taken any interest in what I do or how I am). I have been close to God in the sense that I've been reading his words everyday (http://www.rbc.org/odb/odb.shtml - Our Daily Bread) and praying to him often, like having a relationship with him. In the past 2-3 months, I have felt his presence more than I ever had my entire life before the breakup/fight.
Objectively, my life is in a much better position without her, but then I just feel really hurt. The events between me and her in the last 3+ months shows me a totally new person, separate from the person she was when the relationship first started. She has been doing this fashion stuff since Jan last year. I have put a lot of my life and effort into her, and basically I am really hurt deep within me. Anyway, I think I will stop at here and wait for some response before yakking any further.
Thanks in advance for your time and help,
- Raymond