I want answers to my questions does the answer consists mainly of "you just have to believe" or a few bible verses which sometimes do make feel better but other times rationality makes me think there is nothing else and I wanna have fun and be normal I want to get drunk sometimes and do stuff like that but I am deeply concerned with whats after life, I believe and even he has given me lots of reasons to one time I lost something valuable that same day I told myself I'd find something much more valuable than that. What do u know when I sat down not far from when I said it I found this crucifix at my feet. What If he's not real what if religion is a part of humanity and we invented it, I don't want this to be true I wan god to exist because If I didn't it would be sad, but I just wanna take the way out and sometimes it seems easier to not believe so I can stop caring and go back to my ecstasy and weed