A sign of the times

  • Thread starter Boanerges(Inactive)
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The best things are nearest: breath in your nostrils, light in
your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path
of God just before you.

-- Robert Louis Stevenson
 
Church Bloopers

CHURCH BLOOPERS

1) Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the carpet will come forward and do so.
2) The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.
3) Thursday night--Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
4) The Lutheran men's group will meet at 6 p.m. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
5) A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
6) 8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
7) The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
8) At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
9) The preacher will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth With Joy."
10) Today... Christian Youth Fellowship Sexuality Course, 8 p.m. Please park in the rear parking lot for this activity.
11) During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when A.B. Doe supplied our pulpit.
12) The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.
13) The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Shirley Green who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens
 
"A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing."
 
Good posts everyone- I am really enjoying them- thanks -bother Larry
 
I type the church bulletin every week and I caught a major blooper before it went to publication. I don't remember exactly what the subject was but I remember the typo, it said, "If you don't understand, ask the preacher and he will give you hell" (instead of give you help). Boy was I glad I caught that one (or I would have caught it :)
 
I type the church bulletin every week and I caught a major blooper before it went to publication. I don't remember exactly what the subject was but I remember the typo, it said, "If you don't understand, ask the preacher and he will give you hell" (instead of give you help). Boy was I glad I caught that one (or I would have caught it :)
:D
 
"Are you wrinkled with burden?

Come on into Church for a faith lift!"
 
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Having 'truth' decay?

'Brush' up on your Bible!
 
Thank you...



Man's way leads to a hopeless end!

God's way leads to an endless hope!
 
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