Angry

[Hopeforfuture]

I am angry at God. I graduated a year ago from college, and I am single, I don't know anyone and I can't find people to meet. I want to have a family, but I'm still living at home working in a job i hate. I started asking God a few years ago to help me
Want his will for my life. I pray that he will draw me close to him, strengthen my faith, but I have wanted to be married for so long- so I ask him for peace. Every day. I ask him help me to be content, but it gets worse, no matter how I try to distract myself. A few years ago, I was addicted to porn. I got professional Christian help, and I've not looked at porn for 4 years. I wonder if he punishes me for looking at it, even though I confessed and repent. Maybe He will not let me get married now. But I'd rather die than be single any longer- I pray he kill me. But I could not be with another person with this anger. But I can't not be angry. For I ask him for marriage more than I have asked for anything else, more than I've wanted anything else. And there is no hope for that. I am angry at everyone I know who is married.

 

[Fish Catcher Jim]

Hopeforfuture
Welcome to cfs,

As we ask of all new memers,
Please look over the Following and Familiarize yourself with them, this will help you to have a safe and joyful time here in the forum.

Again this is just forum procedure and nothing else.

1. Forum Policies and Procedures
2. Topics which May Not Be Discussed in the open forum.

If you have any questions or issues with the forum, please feel free to contact a moderator or helper and we will do what we can to help.

Again Welcome to cfs
Blessings
FCJ

 

[Fish Catcher Jim]

Greetings Hopeforfuture ,
I get it your angry and frustrated and that alone is going to work against you.

Scripture tells us
IF we will draw close to God THEN He will draw close to us.
God is not going to do this for you, for God is not going to do for you what He has already said to do in His Word.

For I ask him for marriage more than I have asked for anything else, more than I've wanted anything else. And there is no hope for that. I am angry at everyone I know who is married.

So why not turn this around.
Seek God More then anything else.
Stop getting angry and doing what you want because you are mad.

Faith is what pleases God.
Thankfulness pleases God.
Anger pleases our enemy the devil.
Anger allows our enemy a way to work against you.

Know God Know Peace
No God No Peace.

Will be praying
Blessings
FCJ

 

[Cturtle]

Welcome to cfs.

I'm sorry to hear that your really angry. I have just spent the past couple of weeks getting rid of my anger, because if my situation... so I feel your pain.

I can guarantee you that God is not punishing you. For His Word says that He forgets our sins on purpose, and remembers them no more. So the judgement you feel is from your enemy the devil, not from God.

He loves you so much, and just desires to spend time with you and to be able to show you how much He loves you. But He needs your help. He needs you to trust Him, and spend time with Him. He is a gentleman so He will not force Himself upon you... nor will He force you to spend time with Him.

So my friend the ball is now in your court. And life is in your hands. If your unhappy with your job... it's time to find another one. If your tired of being angry... it's time to find your peace and joy in Him. Thank Him for all that He has already given you and for giving you wisdom for everything. And the biggest thing I recommend is to repent for being angry. Repent for allowing the enemy to manifest in your life. And then begin to refocus and renew your mind with His Holy Word. For its the only place that you will find your peace... in His arms.

I found a picture that I keep on my phone as wallpaper. It's not The Father... but it reminds me that all I have to do is crawl into His arms/lap and He will comfort me.



Thank You Father for surrounding This precious daughter of yours with peace and joy. We bind the spirit of anger and fear and loose peace and love. Peace that passes all of her understanding. Envelope her in Your favor, and love and send ministering spirits to comfort her. Show her how much You love her, and make Yourself very real to her. Thank You also Father for granting unto her the gift of repentance, so that she may recover herself out of the snare of the enemy.
In Jesus Name we pray Amen

Blessings of grace, favor and Peace to you sister in abundance.
Cturtle

 

[autumn oddity]

I couls have wrote this myself I was yonna write something similar ....

 

[Cturtle]

I couls have wrote this myself I was yonna write something similar ....

God loves you too and is not punishing you. If anything it's the enemy messing with you to get you angry with God, and that not walking in love...robs you of your faith and trust in Him to help bring your dreams true.

 

[Siloam]

I may be reading more into this post than was meant, but...

God does not 'punish' in this manner, but will help you turn toward Him. If you have truely confessed, which includes commiting to turning from the sin.

If your interest in marriage and starting a family is largely a manifestation of your desire for physical gratification, I would caution you.

If you have any desire for porn remaining, do not think that marriage will fulfill your urges and release you from that trap. In fact, it is more likely to be an impediment to creating a true spiritual bond with your husband. And all that should be squared away before you choose to become a parent.

Entering into marriage to facilitate intimacy is like buying a home because you admire kitchen appliances and need a home to put them in. Having this as the goal is likely to lead to unfortunate choices of where to live, and the purchase of the wrong home.

If I have misread or misunderstood your post, I apologize, but there are too many young men and women that see marriage as a liscense to indulge themselves rather than a union where the joy of each is enhanced by bringing joy to the other, and to their union.

 

[Hopeforfuture]

Thanks for your answer. I hope it's ok to say this on the forum, I don't want to be insppropropriste. I have accepted that I will always have infulfilled sexual desires that should point me to the lord. After feeding perverse desires for yeass, there is damage and I cannot simply stop desiring sexual relations.

I do not have friends, and I don't open up very easily, even to my bible study group. I try and work on it, but part of it is just my personality. I was sexually abused in the past years ago, and that is ok now, but I think I became more private after that.

I want someone who will help me be closer to god. Someone who helps me think through spiritual questions. Someone who is a friend. I know I have all I need in the lord. I pray to him when I am alone. But I am so lonely at home and so lonely in my life. I say to god that I know he is enough even though I don't always feel this way. But I don't want to be alone in life. I don't want to be unhappy single becauE I know if I'm not happy now, marriage will not make me happy. I don't want to even be having these ways of thinking. I am lonely.

 

[Abdicate]

I am angry at God. I graduated a year ago from college, and I am single, I don't know anyone and I can't find people to meet. I want to have a family, but I'm still living at home working in a job i hate. I started asking God a few years ago to help me
Want his will for my life. I pray that he will draw me close to him, strengthen my faith, but I have wanted to be married for so long- so I ask him for peace. Every day. I ask him help me to be content, but it gets worse, no matter how I try to distract myself. A few years ago, I was addicted to porn. I got professional Christian help, and I've not looked at porn for 4 years. I wonder if he punishes me for looking at it, even though I confessed and repent. Maybe He will not let me get married now. But I'd rather die than be single any longer- I pray he kill me. But I could not be with another person with this anger. But I can't not be angry. For I ask him for marriage more than I have asked for anything else, more than I've wanted anything else. And there is no hope for that. I am angry at everyone I know who is married.

Maybe the one He wants you to have isn't being obedient either. It's not about you. Be what God wants you to be and then He'll give you the desires of your heart. You need to change your mind about God. He wants a relationship and how can He if you judge Him like you do.