I can't pretend everything is alright any longer!

I can't pretend everything is alright any longer!

As much as I dislike asking for help. I think it's time I asked for it.

I feel like their are times when my spirit is broken. When I really hate the person looking back at me in the mirror. I always seem to doubt myself and think I'm not good enough. People often be-little me and say they are better. I really do feel like a failure. It's a dream of mine to pull it all together. To beable to live up to a higher standard. I want to beable to meet the expectations I have set for myself. But I always become so discouraged. Please, can someone give me some advice? I could really use some support on this. I'm tired of doing everything alone.

Thanks.

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Mary-I'm a top ace reporter! I get down to the dirt. I don't play around!
 
I was feeling like that all the time a while ago. I only have one peice of advice. I think you should find a very good friend and say everything about this to them no matter what. That's what I did.

Thats all I got...

Oh and Pray to God...
 
God don't make no junk, Mary. Everyone is valuable in His sight. And His sight is the one that matters the most.
So great is His love that He sacrificed His only born son so that we could become sons and daughters of His as well.
Take comfort and have peace in the fact that you are safe and secure in His family as are all those who believe in and obey Him.
Your problem (and it is common these days) amung teens and many older adults as well is a matter of dis-organized thinking.
We all have troubles. And we all have at times a poor self image. We all have those who for what ever reason put us down. Don't let them steal your peace from you.
Take solice in the words of the apostle Paul ,who had great trials and learned by the Grace of God to have contentment in all things.

Phi 4:11
Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.
Phi 4:12 I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.
Phi 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Fellowship with christians your own age will most definately help. For they can relate. Look to your parents and confide in them as well. They were teenagers and love you more than anyone else on the this earth.And last but certianly not least ,trust in the Lord.


Sincerely content
in Him
Cliff
 
hi Mary, no matter how you may feel about yourself; God loves you anyway.

Pray constantly. Seek Him. Write down your plans, your concerns and offer them all to our Lord. He alone can give you peace and contentment. He alone can change your heart and give you comfort during this time.

Lastly, only God can judge us because he alone knows what's in our heart so don't let others' opinion affect you. (I know that's hard to do but just give it all to God and look up to Him)

I'll be praying for you.
 
I'm praying earnestly that the Lord will fill your heart with the peace only he can give. And that you may have full assurance of faith, and filled with joy. That you may be comforted and strengthened in your inner being.

Let God's word dwell in you richly. Meditate on it day and night.

Even though it doesn't seem like anything may be working in your favor, the Lord says it is and you'll need to trust his word. Ask him for help to trust and overcome any doubts.

One person Jesus encountered on his journeys here on Earth said: " I believe, help me overcome my unbelief".
 
Mary I am so sorry for your pain- I don't like the person in the mirror either but thank God there is something else going on in my life- I am litterally dieing to my old self and finding a new me in Jesus- when you let go- I mean really let go and start trusting Him thats when you see a new person emerging- don't try to better yourself by living up to a list of standards that is legalism and always leads to failure, frustration and worse- don't spend all your time and energy trying to please others cause that will meet with limited success at best- I reccomend total surrender to God- immerse yourself in His presence and Word - it is only in that place you will really find out who you were created to be- God has given you gifts and talents this world will be incomplete without- don't sell yourself short but instead find your real self out- I pray you find His peace-Larry
 
Thank You, I have much gratitude.

Padelford-When I find those good friends to whom I can open up to. That really wouldn't be a bad idea. =)
Theophilus-Yes, peace. Knowing that I am special in God's eyes, and that I do have a purpose. Being more content, and accepting the obstacles. Thank you for reminding me that. ^_^
Iskij-Hmm, being filled with the Lord. Not these negative thoughts. I guess I just have to release all this anxiety. Allowing God to take over. :D
MartyLK-Not losing faith. I see, letting him in my heart. :cool:
Boanerges-Starting a new life with God. Being completely sure, and giving myself over to him. Letting him control every aspect of my life. This is how I will find my reason for being here.:)

Thank you so much, things are starting to become clear. I am no where near perfect nor am I expected to be. But God loves me anyway. Their will always be people who will disown me. But if I keep holding on, and never give up. And letting Christ work through me. I know it will all be okay. Their is no reason for me to feel so down. :)

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Mary-I'm a top ace reporter! I get down to the dirt. I don't play around!
 
Amen sister-

1Pe 1:2 Elect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through sanctification of the Spirit, unto obedience and sprinkling of the blood of Jesus Christ: Grace unto you, and peace, be multiplied.
1Pe 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,
1Pe 1:4 To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you,
1Pe 1:5 Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
1Pe 1:6 Wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations:
1Pe 1:7 That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:

I have learned ( and am still learning) to rejoice at all times no matter how rough it gets- I have set my heart to rejoice thru the myriad of trails I am being exposed to- I have set my heart to rejoice in the multitude of my weaknesses and shortcomings for when I am weak and inadequate He is so very strong-it is here in the place of trying that our faith can really grow- if I can cope with life on my own it is one thing but when I have to do it leaning on Him He gets the glory.
God gave us each other to lean on but even here the flesh so often gets in the way- there is truely one alternative- one must die to the old and be risen in the new way of life-
I would like to leave you with these two scriptures :


1Jn 4:18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

Php 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice.
 
Someone, I think, Larry, quoted me some scripture that has to do with the blessing of being persecuted and treated terribly by the world. I know that scripture but it wasn't on my mind till it was brought to me. I am being troubled because of my faith in the Lord. Whether it looks like it or not, it is a result of my relationship with Jesus and my hope in him. They are trying to get rid of me and punish me for their reasons but it is being done, ultimately, because of what I am.

Satan tries to remove the comfort of those blessed words by trying to make me think I am suffering at their hands because of wrongs I might have done. I haven't wronged them and I know, with certainty, they are doing what they do, unwittingly doing Satan's will, because I belong to Christ.

You too must see the joy in those words of Christ, that when the world shuns you and treats you terribly, it is because of faith in Christ.

The Lord says to know we are blessed when that happens.

Padelford-When I find those good friends to whom I can open up to. That really wouldn't be a bad idea. =)
Theophilus-Yes, peace. Knowing that I am special in God's eyes, and that I do have a purpose. Being more content, and accepting the obstacles. Thank you for reminding me that. ^_^
Iskij-Hmm, being filled with the Lord. Not these negative thoughts. I guess I just have to release all this anxiety. Allowing God to take over. :D
MartyLK-Not losing faith. I see, letting him in my heart. :cool:
Boanerges-Starting a new life with God. Being completely sure, and giving myself over to him. Letting him control every aspect of my life. This is how I will find my reason for being here.:)

Thank you so much, things are starting to become clear. I am no where near perfect nor am I expected to be. But God loves me anyway. Their will always be people who will disown me. But if I keep holding on, and never give up. And letting Christ work through me. I know it will all be okay. Their is no reason for me to feel so down. :)

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Mary-I'm a top ace reporter! I get down to the dirt. I don't play around!
 
Hey Mary,

I don't have much to add that hasn't been said already, but one sentence in your opening post caught my eye:

I want to beable to meet the expectations I have set for myself.

I think that's the basis of your entire issue. Why are you following the expectations YOU set for yourself? Did you make yourself? Do you know what's best for you? NO! God is the Creator of you and HIS expectations should be what we're all striving for.

Romans 9 says

20But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? "Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, 'Why did you make me like this?' "[h] 21Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for noble purposes and some for common use?

God is the potter, we are merely His creations. As humans, our expecations for ourselves are always flawed...we can't see 5 minutes in front of us, much less over the course of our lifetimes. But God can. He is preparing you for something wonderful. You sound like you've hit rock bottom...right where God wants us to be when we approach Him. Right now, you are a fresh ball of clay that God can mold how HE wants, not how YOU want.

You will never reach the expectations you set for yourself. Even if you did, those expectations would be probably be flawed to begin with...who knows better, the potter or the pot?
 
Hey Mary,

I don't have much to add that hasn't been said already, but one sentence in your opening post caught my eye:



I think that's the basis of your entire issue. Why are you following the expectations YOU set for yourself? Did you make yourself? Do you know what's best for you? NO! God is the Creator of you and HIS expectations should be what we're all striving for.

Romans 9 says



God is the potter, we are merely His creations. As humans, our expecations for ourselves are always flawed...we can't see 5 minutes in front of us, much less over the course of our lifetimes. But God can. He is preparing you for something wonderful. You sound like you've hit rock bottom...right where God wants us to be when we approach Him. Right now, you are a fresh ball of clay that God can mold how HE wants, not how YOU want.

You will never reach the expectations you set for yourself. Even if you did, those expectations would be probably be flawed to begin with...who knows better, the potter or the pot?
This is true because I have fallen many times.The truth is, I don't know what's best for me, that is why I am struggling. I want more than anything to beable to let go and allow God to be my full direction in life. This I know. Doubt and my distance from God has led me no where.

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Mary-I'm a top ace reporter! I get down to the dirt. I don't play around!
 
This is true because I have fallen many times.The truth is, I don't know what's best for me, that is why I am struggling. I want more than anything to beable to let go and allow God to be my full direction in life. This I know. Doubt and my distance from God has led me no where.

That is EXACTLY where every Christian has been at some point in their lives, often times just before accepting Christ. God knows that I've been there a couple of times myself.

In a way, I almost want to congratulate you for where you are--if you truly "let go and let God", you're in for one heck of a great time!
 
Mary17 how are you doing? I ust wanted to say heh and find out if you are ok- as far as brokeness- God usually breaks us of our flesh just before we see His promises manifested in our lives- rejoice YOUR redemption draweth nigh- your brother Larry
 
I'm doing well, thank you. And thanks for being honest and telling me what I needed to hear. :)

____________________________________
You gotta hold passion!
 
This is true because I have fallen many times.The truth is, I don't know what's best for me, that is why I am struggling. I want more than anything to beable to let go and allow God to be my full direction in life. This I know. Doubt and my distance from God has led me no where.

Mary, what kind of doubt are you speaking of?
 
Doubt in myself. And not having enough faith in God to run my life. But I'm tired of this uncertainty. I truly want to change. Because in all honesty living in doubt is like living an incomplete life.

_________________________________
You gotta hold passion!
 
Let the weak say I am strong IN THE STRENGTH OF THE LORD- HIS STRENGTH is made perfect in our weakness-He doesn't perfect the old self He kills it- no death no ressurection- Cast your cares upon HIM FOR HE cares for you- IT IS GOD WORKING IN US to will and to do His pleasure- just some food for thought but God has you just were He wants you and He is acomplishing just what He wants to in your life- relax and trust Him and OUT OF YOUR INNERMOST BEING SHALL FLOW RIVERS OF LIVING WATERS- life is good when you let go and let God take the steering wheel! Have a great night- in His Name Larry
 
Mary, the Lord sometimes brings us to our knees, in love for us and for our spiritual well-being.

It isn't easy; it's a struggle, but continual prayer and humble submission to whatever he desires is the beginning of peace.

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." (Proverbs 9:10 NIV)

He must break us. The old Adam; the sinful nature must be, as Larry says: killed off, in order for the new person, in Christ, to shine. However, the old person must be killed off daily because it is a tenacious rascal.

We cannot have things our way. Our way leads to death but the Lords way is life and peace and salvation. We all must humbly submit to God in all things and not think we know better than God.

We cannot think to ourselves, "this or that is foolish that the Lord is wanting of me." He knows better than we do and we dare not let our ego or pride get in the way of living a Christian life. We cannot say, "Well, the Lord wants me to obey this or that rule but, why? It's only a small thing and I don't see how it can hurt to disobey it."

Here's a classic example of how the Lord deals with our human nature:

This is a very clear and defining story of how our savior humbles us for our good. -

(2 Kings 5: 1-14 NIV)
Now Naaman was commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was a great man in the sight of his master and highly regarded, because through him the LORD had given victory to Aram. He was a valiant soldier, but he had leprosy. Now bands from Aram had gone out and had taken captive a young girl from Israel, and she served Naaman's wife. She said to her mistress, "If only my master would see the prophet who is in Samaria! He would cure him of his leprosy."
Naaman went to his master and told him what the girl from Israel had said. "By all means, go," the king of Aram replied. "I will send a letter to the king of Israel." So Naaman left, taking with him ten talents of silver, six thousand shekels of gold and ten sets of clothing. The letter that he took to the king of Israel read: "With this letter I am sending my servant Naaman to you so that you may cure him of his leprosy."
As soon as the king of Israel read the letter, he tore his robes and said, "Am I God? Can I kill and bring back to life? Why does this fellow send someone to me to be cured of his leprosy? See how he is trying to pick a quarrel with me!"
When Elisha the man of God heard that the king of Israel had torn his robes, he sent him this message: "Why have you torn your robes? Have the man come to me and he will know that there is a prophet in Israel." So Naaman went with his horses and chariots and stopped at the door of Elisha's house. Elisha sent a messenger to say to him, "Go, wash yourself seven times in the Jordan, and your flesh will be restored and you will be cleansed."
But Naaman went away angry and said, "I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the LORD his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy. Are not Abana and Pharpar, the rivers of Damascus, better than any of the waters of Israel? Couldn't I wash in them and be cleansed?" So he turned and went off in a rage.
Naaman's servants went to him and said, "My father, if the prophet had told you to do some great thing, would you not have done it? How much more, then, when he tells you, 'Wash and be cleansed'!" So he went down and dipped himself in the Jordan seven times, as the man of God had told him, and his flesh was restored and became clean like that of a young boy.
 
I understand. God knows me better than I know myself. He has the power to give me wisdom and strength to deal with the difficult times in this world. Not being so egocentric, and building my mind set to visualize on what's important. Becoming selfless, and letting go. Allowing his spirit to take over my well being. ^_^

_______________________
You gotta hold passion!
 
Hi guys,

I really like the verse quoted...

1 John 4:18 (New King James Version)

18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.

I remember feeling small... you know that feeling... unsure of my salvation, not good enough for God, not able to measure up to others or their expectations of me. I hated that feeling and I kept trying to be a 'good Christian' under my own steam and then giving up and drifting away time and time again.

In the last few years I began to realise the huge difference between me and God. The way I think of it is that we are all little bugs jumping as high as we can to reach forgiveness of our sins and even perfection in our life. Looking at other bugs around me some are hardly righteous enough for their feet to leave the floor and some bugs jump 10 centimeters in the air. I want to be as righteous as the bugs who jump high... those people who seem totally in tune with God but that is not where I should be looking. I began to look up and realise that if we are each those bugs God is on the moon. It is impossible for any of us to reach His standards under our own steam. Suddenly those around me and how 'holy or righteously' they were acting seemed unimportant because we were all so far from the place we were trying to reach. It took a loving Saviour (and I mean more loving than we can begin to imagine) to die for us and give us the gift of salvation in order for us to reach the point where we could come before God and receive His gift of salvation.

What you have to remember about those around you is that no matter how much you see them (from once every few years up to every waking moment) we can never see into their hearts as God can. The status of their relationship with God is between them and God. There may be a person at church who looks 'squeeky clean' but their life faith could be falling apart at the seems or a person who always seems to struggle but is drawing near to God.

I hope you will reflect on these passages....
NKJV
James 4:7-10
7 Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.

Luke 18:9-14
9To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: 10"Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.' 13"But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'
14"I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

John 15:9
9 “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love."

Fellowship with others and check what they say against the Bible.
Pray - don't be afraid to tell God your innermost feelings and struggles - He knows them already
Read - the Bible.... in addition their are some wonderful Christian authors such as Beth Moore and Max Lucado
Rejoice - in your salvation and all the blessings in your life.

Sorry this took so long to say but I hope this helps!
wizabuff

PS I think I read the 'bugs' story in a Max Lucado book
 
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