It would be errenous to think God did evil. As I said you need not understand why things happened at the particular time. Let it resonate with you, seek out spiritual counsellors if necessary but don't surrender your heart or assume it is untrue. Wait for God to reconcile reality with your heart.
Children often think their parents are mean or evil for spanking them and then come to realize it was necessary for them.
I don't need this passage to resonate with me as Jesus clearly states we should turn the other cheek and refrain from violence! Maybe it would do you justice to re read the Gospels! Jesus bless you friend!