THE INNER ROOM - "Learn and Grow - to Maturity". Please read the 1st Post.
- Thread starter Bondman
- Start date
- Status
B
Boanerges(Inactive)
Guest
Nice thread guys- you rock!
Still seeing you two doing the jitterbug!!
Hey! Good posts!
Fluffy, I can't express to you how wonderful this is of the Lord (thru you, dear heart)! Cos we are both well into stress breakdown now, and I'm utterly exhausted. Our medical problems continue to get worse. Life for the past 5 1/2 months has been the toughest we've ever experienced (which is really saying something!) So I'm trusting the Lord that our deliverance that He has promised to me of the healing of our so-sick bodies, and our bank account (for ministry), is getting nearer and nearer!
What's sure and certain is that always:
"We can TRUST Him to do what's right!"
Nice thread guys- you rock!
Boanerges, thanks so much for the encouragement! Hey, I was just thinking that if we rock - then this is due to The Rock!!! Wow, He is so wonderful that words cannot express...
Beloved, will do! (Part 5 almost finished - may be the final. Phew!) And ditto to what I said to Boanerges!
Praying
Bondman,
I am praying for yo daily. I hope you know.
Just want to let you know that I will off line, excepte to check in and print off your messages and check for any pms. I have decided to be more attentive to Norm in obedience to the Lord. I just soooo want him to come to see God's grace. But you two will be being remembered.
Thanx for all the wisdom from these two, Jesus! :groupray:
Bondman,
I am praying for yo daily. I hope you know.
Just want to let you know that I will off line, excepte to check in and print off your messages and check for any pms. I have decided to be more attentive to Norm in obedience to the Lord. I just soooo want him to come to see God's grace. But you two will be being remembered.
Thanx for all the wisdom from these two, Jesus! :groupray:
Thank you, Bonnie! It's been a real joy. I commend you for wanting to give Norm more time. Just so long as you keep growing so you've got more and more to offer him - and I know that you will!
Thankyou for praying for us. Always need that! You are in my prayers daily also. Bless you so abundantly in knowledge of Jesus and growth in the Spirit
- BM with his Mrs
PRACTICAL NEW TESTAMENT CHRISTIANITY
MESSAGE #29
HOW TO WALK, LIVE & PRAY IN THE SPIRIT (very Important!) - Part 5
... Continued from Part 4. Part 1 is HERE.
Maybe it's time to pause, and take stock of what we've been saying in this IMPORTANT TOPIC, about which there can be so much confusion.
Filling with the Spirit is for those wholly committed to the Lord. It's an on-going thing. It's NOT necessarily connected with the GIFT of speaking in tongues (unknown languages). And it's a command from God - NOT an option! You want to be OBEDIENT to the Lord, don't you? Then you need to start asking for Him to be filling you with the Spirit every day!
And so to a summation of the first part of these brief words, about a major and very important subject:
HOW DO WE WALK IN THE SPIRIT?
We walk in the Spirit by being FILLED with the Spirit on a daily basis. Walking in the Spirit simply means walking - living - the way He wants us to! Thus my stress on BEING OBEDIENT to our wonderful God as part of writing these Messages.
HOW DO WE LIVE IN THE SPIRIT?
The same as above. Our time here on earth is very short. Soon we go to be in Eternity with our God. But here on earth, I see so many Christians living as if life here is a period to be having a good time with lots of material possessions, and money and the like. Does that sound to you like the way to get ready to live with God in eternity? HARDLY!! Came into the world with NOTHING - leave the same way. Except that you can set a goal right now of LEARNING and GROWING - towards becoming a MATURE MAN OR WOMAN IN CHRIST, just as fast as you possibly can!! That way when you step through death to meet the Lord it will be as a full-grown Christian - not still as a child, or a baby!!! (This is going to happen to millions! - how embarrassing, to say the very least...)
When's the time to start towards this? It's TODAY!!
Okay, and does living in the Spirit mean 'service', i.e., working for the Lord? Certainly can do. But service springs out of LOVE and COMMITMENT to Him. So getting committed and FILLED with the Spirit by the One Who gives us the only POWER we're ever gonna get in order to be able TO serve Him - this simply HAS to take priority in our lives. That will enable you to get to have JESUS as the focus of the whole of our being. Isn't that what you want? Alright then: the right KIND of service, service that works and is effective, will flow out of that!
HOW DO WE PRAY IN THE SPIRIT?
If you're not being filled with the Spirit by following the things set forth in these messages, then you cannot pray in the Spirit. And if you're not praying in the Spirit, then don't be one bit surprised if your prayers don't seem to work very well! If Spirit filling is IMPORTANT to you, and something you ask Him for and keep asking, then you will get to AUTOMATICALLY pray in the Spirit, as you look to Him in your daily walk! Can you handle that!!! There are those who want you to think this is some sort of mystical once only ('rah-rah') experience. The Scriptures are perfectly clear that it's NOT! It's supposed to be normal Christian living!! (as it is for me). That this is certainly NOT the case, ought to give pause for VERY serious thought by us all!
Finally, I mentioned in a post that this verse:
Ephesians Ch 5:18
And do not be drunk with wine, for that is debauchery; but ever be filled and stimulated with the (Holy) Spirit,
is stressing that the Greek text clearly says for us to always BE BEING FILLED with the Holy Spirit!!! That's His command. Not just ONCE, but on-going. Today, tomorrow, and on from there. We desperately NEED His power, or our Christian lives will - can - NEVER work!
My prayer for every person here is for you to start to live according to the Scriptures - in such a way that you can expect to be being constantly FILLED with the Holy Spirit of God - in order that you may WALK, LIVE and PRAY in the Spirit! Cos this is VERY important!!!
Concluded in Part 6...
With piles of love in Jesus our Lord!
- BM and his Mrs
QUESTIONS WELCOME!
PRACTICAL NEW TESTAMENT CHRISTIANITY
MESSAGE #30
THE QUESTION OF GUILT
Why do we feel guilty? Christians I mean. Well, I guess it goes with the territory, doesn't it? Of all people we're the ones aware of our sin and sinfulness (at least I HOPE we are), and aware that no matter how hard we try we still fall short at the very best, and maybe even keep bombing out at worst - even tho this is NOT what we want! RESULT: we feel guilty! How can we not?
You may think that the our Guidebook tells us that Jesus died to take away not just all our sin, but also our guilt and shame. But it doesn't - it simply doesn't say He died to take away our guilt. Not very good news perhaps? Especially if our life is quite wracked by guilt over how we've lived, or what we've done, guilt that we simply cannot, just cannot seem to get rid of!
But please have no fear nor concern! We simply need to see HOW our guilt is taken care of! Jesus' sacrifice on my behalf and yours was totally accepted by the Father, as being totally sufficient to COVER ALL OF OUR SIN. Jesus' death brought total forgiveness for every sin. Many don't realise this. They think that unless they keep CONFESSING their sin then it's not forgiven. This is simply not so according to the New Testament:
A. Jesus BORE all of my sin and yours while He was on the Cross. He paid the full price for it there so we could be set free. And having done so He died, then the third day rose from the dead and returned to heaven. While on the cross the Father placed all of your sins - that's ALL OF THEM! - upon Jesus, and there and then He paid the full penalty for them!!! Such love as this the world has never seen before or since...
So what did this achieve? It ALLOWED FOR ALL OF YOUR SIN TO BE FORGIVEN. But ONLY ALLOWED this, okay - one more very essential step is required for it all to actually BE FORGIVEN.
B. When you accepted Jesus as Saviour and Lord and gave all of your life to Him, at that moment ALL OF YOUR SIN WAS FORGIVEN FOREVER. ALL OF IT!!!
So where does guilt fit in then? WE FEEL GUILT WHEN WE SIN... AND THEN FAIL TO REMEMBER THAT EVERY SIN IS COMPLETELY FORGIVEN! "I sinned again. Against God. He must be SO angry at me. Or at least very very disappointed. Oh dear, what can I do?" How many of us have gone through this sort of experience! But it's quite unnecessary! WHY? Because all of that sin is fully forgiven BY ALMIGHTY GOD!!! And if HE'S FORGIVEN ME - then why on earth am I being silly and allowing myself to feel guilt about the sin??
Why indeed!! Here's what I do if I've flunked again and hurt Jesus, virtually crucifying Him afresh - no wonder we feel GUILTY! - but the fact is that I don't feel any guilt!! What I do is say something along these lines, "Lord, I'm sorry. I messed up again. I'm so so sorry. Thankyou, thankyou, THANKYOU for Your forgiveness. I'M FORGIVEN! You did that. I'm clean! It's okay! You still love me!! Wow, You are the BEST!!!" And that's it. Any guilt - if I had any, which I never do any more - HEY, IT'S ALL GONE!!!
Please, please get this: No sin ever being counted against you by God means exactly THIS: NOTHING for you to EVER feel guilty about!!! NOT A THING! So please give up guilt! Instead, when you sin, concentrate on BEING GRATEFUL and GIVING JESUS THANKS! That is perfectly sufficient!!!
Below is one of my favouritest verses and truths. I've believed it and lived it for around 50 years. And it's saved me from about a million periods of guilt and condemnation!
Romans Ch 8
1 There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus,
Talk about fantabulous news!! NO CONDEMNATION! I'm not condemned! Hallelujah!! Never, ever, ever! So no guilt ever!!! I AM TRULY FREE!!!
May this be your experience in the Lord Jesus for the rest of your Christian life also!
- BM, with his Mrs
QUESTIONS WELCOME!
Guilty
That's good to know that you don't have to ask forgiveness daily. I have been doing that. I thought it was like seeking for the Holy Spirit, which you need to do daily. So, what about the sins you committed before? You don't need to lay them before God, each one of them, one statement of "please forgive me" covers all of them? I never thought of that before, but I ask forgiveness for them in case I forgot one every night. Not that I think I have not been forgiven. I just thought everyone did that. I was saved in my bedroom and did it the best I knew how. This is the first time I've heard this addressed.
Also, a guilty feeling I always carry around is when I had an affair and never told my husband about it. I didn't tell him because it would probably change our marriage in the trust area. How do I get rid of this guilt? Do I need to confess it to my husband afterall?
That's good to know that you don't have to ask forgiveness daily. I have been doing that. I thought it was like seeking for the Holy Spirit, which you need to do daily. So, what about the sins you committed before? You don't need to lay them before God, each one of them, one statement of "please forgive me" covers all of them? I never thought of that before, but I ask forgiveness for them in case I forgot one every night. Not that I think I have not been forgiven. I just thought everyone did that. I was saved in my bedroom and did it the best I knew how. This is the first time I've heard this addressed.
Also, a guilty feeling I always carry around is when I had an affair and never told my husband about it. I didn't tell him because it would probably change our marriage in the trust area. How do I get rid of this guilt? Do I need to confess it to my husband afterall?
Filled
I wanted to say one thing more: You said "If Spirit filling is IMPORTANT to you, and something you ask Him for and keep asking, then you will get to AUTOMATICALLY pray in the Spirit, as you look to Him in your daily walk!"
Just to clarify that statement for me, please. We've pm'd about this before. You said it sounds like I am filled with the Holy Spirit. And that night that I prayed outloud with my two friends, I had no fear and felt like it was led by the H.S. Sooooo. . . did you mean in this post that "praying in the Spirit" is speaking another language, or just praying as the Spirit leds? Because, I don't speak in tongues. Do I still need to pray to do that?
I wanted to say one thing more: You said "If Spirit filling is IMPORTANT to you, and something you ask Him for and keep asking, then you will get to AUTOMATICALLY pray in the Spirit, as you look to Him in your daily walk!"
Just to clarify that statement for me, please. We've pm'd about this before. You said it sounds like I am filled with the Holy Spirit. And that night that I prayed outloud with my two friends, I had no fear and felt like it was led by the H.S. Sooooo. . . did you mean in this post that "praying in the Spirit" is speaking another language, or just praying as the Spirit leds? Because, I don't speak in tongues. Do I still need to pray to do that?
AMEN!, Bondman! You hit the nail on the head, again!
That verse is the very one God gave me when He was trying to teach me about forgiving myself. And when the enemy tries to bring condemnation on me again for past mistakes, that is the verse I quote outloud and he backs off! ha!
Thankyou once again, my dear, dear friend!
Wow, that's a great point about using the Romans verse for forgiving onesself! Love it! Some of us can be SO tough on ourselves, hey! BUT WE'RE NOT UNDER ANY CONDEMNATION from the only One Who matters!!!
"Great God Who we name as our God, Your forgiveness is total, it's permanent, and it's real! For all of THAT, how can I possibly say THANKYOU to You? - except by just saying, 'Thankyou!!!'" - Your undeserving son.
PRACTICAL NEW TESTAMENT CHRISTIANITY
MESSAGE #31
HOW TO WALK, LIVE & PRAY IN THE SPIRIT (very Important!) - Part 6
... Continued from Part 5. Part 1 is HERE.
Thankyou for your great questions, Bonnie! So we're all absolutely clear what the New Testament says about what you've asked:
.:: Praying in the Spirit does NOT require the gift of tongues.
.:: Praying in the Spirit is NOT the same thing as the gift of tongues.
Prayer in the Spirit concerns those who've surrendered their whole life to the Lord Jesus Christ and committed to being His forever. A person who's done this can and will be FILLED WITH THE SPIRIT - but not BEFORE making this life-changing commitment to Jesus! This person will then aim to continue to be filled with the Spirit by OBEYING His commands - including the one that says we are to always BE BEING filled! Because without that filling we simply CANNOT live the life!!!
All of this is very much concerned with our ATTITUDE of heart and mind, and our attitude to life and daily living. It's NOT at all easy for we Westerners to get totally given over to the Lord Jesus - or most of us already would be!! Agree? At the very least we want to retain some control of our own lives, NOT give it all up to Him! I mean, let's not get TOO drastic about all of this!!... well, that's our general societal attitude anyway.
To illustrate what I mean please permit me to explain from the New Testament why I call myself Bondman, because this may help clarify some important matters. 'Bondman' is a translation of the Greek word that the great Paul often used about Himself: doulos. Because we all hate slavery, this word is mostly translated into English in a way that QUITE SERIOUSLY FAILS to express what it really means. If you were a doulos at best you were a SERVANT with few freedoms; at worst you were what can only be described as a bond-slave.
Over and over Paul was not calling himself a servant to Jesus at all - but a BOND-SLAVE to Jesus! So what does this mean?
• A bond-slave, or bondman, was bought as a chattel by his master.
• He had no status whatsoever as a person.
• He existed solely and totally to simply do and be whatever his master required.
• He had NO RIGHTS of any kind. If the master chose to beat him every day, he could say not a word, nor do a thing about this.
• And he was a bond-slave for LIFE. No excape, no freedom possible. A hole was made in his ear to show his status.
I've described HERE how I took Jesus as Lord of my life in 1969. In 1999, because I was so acutely aware of His abounding love to me, I chose of my own free-will to move up to bond-slave/bondman. Since then, as Jesus' very, very, very willing bondman, I've given up all of my rights, and given them all over to Jesus. I have no rights of my own left. He rules. He is pre-eminent. I am as nothing. He is everything. I live to serve Him as bond-slave. Whatever He wants I do my very best to do, with the help of the Holy Spirit. Thus I have become obedient to all things in the New Testament that I've seen to do there - again with the Holy Spirit's help (could NOT do this with my own abilities!) If I read a new command, I take that on immediately. Because I am His man - NOT my own man.
Now before you start thinking (if you haven't already!) that this makes me into some sort of 'yes man', or even zombie, let me tell you that NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH. In giving up the whole of myself to Jesus, I have gained SO MUCH, and continue to GAIN MORE, such that I would literally not swap my life if you offered me $1 billion to do so, or offered me power and position and luxury living for the rest of my days. NO, NO, NO!!! I love my life as it is!!! I will NEVER give it up, ever!!!!
Because -- when you have constant deep-down LOVE, deep-down JOY, and deep-down PEACE that absolutely NOTHING that happens can ever shake, why would you want to give that up? When you have the God of the Universe, of Heaven and Everything as your constant and ever-present Friend and Supporter and Helper, why would you want to give that up? So in LOSING MYSELF I gained EVERYTHING!!! Jesus really IS my LIFE. He's utterly FIRST! All else fits in and comes below that. And MY needs, wants, whatever, come last of all. Do I then consider that I lack anything? Not at all! He takes complete care of me and all of my life, ALWAYS. And in case it crossed your mind, yes, to me He is the most WONDERFUL MASTER you could ever possibly imagine.
Remember how Jesus said in
Mark Ch 8
35 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it.
Now Jesus is no dummy, right! So when He says another of those apparent Scripture contradictions I've told you about, He means it!! Try to save your life (for yourself) and you WILL lose it. GIVE UP/LOSE YOUR LIFE TO HIM - AND YOU SAVE IT! My life is living proof of that statement! What I lost I count as dung just like Paul said (check out Phil 3:8) - because what I've given up is as nothing compared to ALL THAT I'VE GAINED!!!
So to finish where we started, to pray in the Spirit will be in our own simple words, in our mind, aloud, whatever, and this is perfectly sufficient. Or it may be in tongues - but which will help no other person unless it's interpreted. But that's for another time.
- BM, with his Lady-love
QUESTIONS WELCOME!
Wow, more great questions! So important that I'll do a message of them too, soon as I can. Till then relax, okay! - cos you're doin' fine.
Bless you, hon, and your hubby too!!
Sharing my lesson
Hi there! I missed some awesome posts lately while gone! Great messages.
Some of you know the journey I have been on. I posted my lesson from God on another thread in regards to marriage but wanted to post it here as well.
It is so fitting to what you are all talking about.
I will post in 2 parts as lengthy.
Man What a Journey it has been. God has been trying to talk to me for a long time. It was trust in him. It was a longing from him for me to love him with my whole heart. It was my total heart and focus he has wanted for so long.
You see for so long, I was living life trying to do it my way. I was just sure I had the answers what was best for me. I just wanted to be loved. I just wanted to be accepted. This longing lead me down a long road of relationships with men. Seeking to be loved , that was my mission, not knowing all along God loved me.
God really spoke to me this past week-end. You see I have been in a relationship with yet another man. Man I loved him. But I did not trust him. I always felt there was something there. I met this man 19 months ago. We sat upon a deck and shared our hearts on that first week-end. We shared our weaknesses and strengths. He shared from his heart that his was porn. Mine was lack of trust. I was always hurt and betrayed in the past. He shared about a woman from the past that met his physical needs in life. He did not love her the way that a man and woman loved each other. They had a chemistry physical attraction. He told me about her and how persistent she was in calling. He told me this in case she called. We had an awesome first week-end together. He gave me a garage door opener to his home. His home was now a place where I was welcome to share in life.
I was given access to his computer. There was never once any words spoken do not look here, do not look there. But you see, in the past I was always looking for some sign of distrust. People hurt me. They betrayed me. As I did not treasure my body, the temple given to me from the Lord, I was having sexual relations with them. Oh yes there were a few moments of pleasure, but it was not long lasting. Not enough to fulfill me.
I continued in this relationship. We prayed together. We had devotions together. I experienced things in life I never had before. This man cared for me. He did little things for me, he did big things for me. He loved me. He encouraged me to reach my dreams.
He prayed with me. He encouraged me to get healthy. He was right there with me when I swam across that lake. He was there holding me when I was in frustration and tears with working full time job, a part time job and carrying 16 credits for college. But in my heart, I kept thinking does he really love just me? Since he has his struggles and I know what they are, can he just really love me? Is he still turning to others to meet his physical needs?
We were late one day in going to church and that is when I found the chapel. This little church at the bottom of a hill. I heard the message how much God loves me. I heard the message of salvation. Yes a few years back I gave my life to Christ, but I truly did not know what it meant. As I continued at church there, I continued to learn how awesome Jesus is, what he did for me. He died for me! He died to take all of my sins and hurts and pains! Pick up the word and read the truth. That was what I was encouraged to do.
So I stared to seek God diligently. But in the back of my heart, I still had fear and untrust.
A chain of events which I shall write about later, led me to seek sexual purity. I truly wanted to be obedient to God. I truly wanted the answers in life. I wanted the victorious life that is written in the Bible. Upon doing this, I started with a discharge which led me to the doctor’s office. I had a pap smear done and all of my sexual disease testing done.
The test came back abnormal. I was diagnosed with High risk HPV and Mild Dysplasia.
Well I just knew now! He must have been screwing around with someone else. (Even though this virus can live in our bodies for a long time and then rear it’s ugly head).
Oh and yes, I snooped and looked at his cell phone. He was still calling her as she was calling him.. I did not understand it! Why? when he loved me.
Through this time, as I became obedient with tithing, having sexual purity and being in the word, God started to really bless me. He has always been with me, he never left me,but I left him. Out of the blue, I got a call about another job offer which would lead me to a land of the unknown at the same time I would be only 45 minutes away from the man I loved. Now mind you, I still had that hidden sin. I hid my untrust. I just did not want to be betrayed again. I prayed to God that if this was part of his plan for me, for that door to be wide open. Well God is amazing! He got me on a airplane to go to that interview. I was number 68 out of 142 for standby on a plane. There were only 6 seats available and my name got called!
I got to that interview and then the lesson of patience came in once again. I waited for the call. As I did, I seeked God like I never had before. I fasted. I prayed. I wrote out a specific prayer. I wanted answers and I knew God could provide them. Now mind you, I had at the same time gotten the news of potential cervical cancer due to exposure to an STD, another scar of my impure life. The call came with the offer, but part of me still had to know, how much this man loved me. I made arrangements to go visit the facilty.
This would also give me the time and another day to get a vision of whether or not, cancer was invading me. I could also talk to the man about his loyalty to me. You see I thought it was the man in life and his loyalty to me that I needed to talk about, but really it was God that wanted me to see and talk to him!
As I sat with the man I loved, and went around a conversation for 2 hours, I came to read the scripture to him, James 5:16 – therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a rightetous man is powerful and effective. James 5:19- My brothers if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back, 20:- remember this : Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins.
I read it the first time- and a voice said “read it again” and I did. It was at that moment I found God was speaking to me- it was me that had wandered from the truth. It was me, God wanted to speak to- not the man I loved. Here I sat and basically was questioning this man’s fidelity and love to me, but God wanted to know my fidelity and love to him!
Go to part 2 Faithwoman
Hi there! I missed some awesome posts lately while gone! Great messages.
Some of you know the journey I have been on. I posted my lesson from God on another thread in regards to marriage but wanted to post it here as well.
It is so fitting to what you are all talking about.
I will post in 2 parts as lengthy.
Man What a Journey it has been. God has been trying to talk to me for a long time. It was trust in him. It was a longing from him for me to love him with my whole heart. It was my total heart and focus he has wanted for so long.
You see for so long, I was living life trying to do it my way. I was just sure I had the answers what was best for me. I just wanted to be loved. I just wanted to be accepted. This longing lead me down a long road of relationships with men. Seeking to be loved , that was my mission, not knowing all along God loved me.
God really spoke to me this past week-end. You see I have been in a relationship with yet another man. Man I loved him. But I did not trust him. I always felt there was something there. I met this man 19 months ago. We sat upon a deck and shared our hearts on that first week-end. We shared our weaknesses and strengths. He shared from his heart that his was porn. Mine was lack of trust. I was always hurt and betrayed in the past. He shared about a woman from the past that met his physical needs in life. He did not love her the way that a man and woman loved each other. They had a chemistry physical attraction. He told me about her and how persistent she was in calling. He told me this in case she called. We had an awesome first week-end together. He gave me a garage door opener to his home. His home was now a place where I was welcome to share in life.
I was given access to his computer. There was never once any words spoken do not look here, do not look there. But you see, in the past I was always looking for some sign of distrust. People hurt me. They betrayed me. As I did not treasure my body, the temple given to me from the Lord, I was having sexual relations with them. Oh yes there were a few moments of pleasure, but it was not long lasting. Not enough to fulfill me.
I continued in this relationship. We prayed together. We had devotions together. I experienced things in life I never had before. This man cared for me. He did little things for me, he did big things for me. He loved me. He encouraged me to reach my dreams.
He prayed with me. He encouraged me to get healthy. He was right there with me when I swam across that lake. He was there holding me when I was in frustration and tears with working full time job, a part time job and carrying 16 credits for college. But in my heart, I kept thinking does he really love just me? Since he has his struggles and I know what they are, can he just really love me? Is he still turning to others to meet his physical needs?
We were late one day in going to church and that is when I found the chapel. This little church at the bottom of a hill. I heard the message how much God loves me. I heard the message of salvation. Yes a few years back I gave my life to Christ, but I truly did not know what it meant. As I continued at church there, I continued to learn how awesome Jesus is, what he did for me. He died for me! He died to take all of my sins and hurts and pains! Pick up the word and read the truth. That was what I was encouraged to do.
So I stared to seek God diligently. But in the back of my heart, I still had fear and untrust.
A chain of events which I shall write about later, led me to seek sexual purity. I truly wanted to be obedient to God. I truly wanted the answers in life. I wanted the victorious life that is written in the Bible. Upon doing this, I started with a discharge which led me to the doctor’s office. I had a pap smear done and all of my sexual disease testing done.
The test came back abnormal. I was diagnosed with High risk HPV and Mild Dysplasia.
Well I just knew now! He must have been screwing around with someone else. (Even though this virus can live in our bodies for a long time and then rear it’s ugly head).
Oh and yes, I snooped and looked at his cell phone. He was still calling her as she was calling him.. I did not understand it! Why? when he loved me.
Through this time, as I became obedient with tithing, having sexual purity and being in the word, God started to really bless me. He has always been with me, he never left me,but I left him. Out of the blue, I got a call about another job offer which would lead me to a land of the unknown at the same time I would be only 45 minutes away from the man I loved. Now mind you, I still had that hidden sin. I hid my untrust. I just did not want to be betrayed again. I prayed to God that if this was part of his plan for me, for that door to be wide open. Well God is amazing! He got me on a airplane to go to that interview. I was number 68 out of 142 for standby on a plane. There were only 6 seats available and my name got called!
I got to that interview and then the lesson of patience came in once again. I waited for the call. As I did, I seeked God like I never had before. I fasted. I prayed. I wrote out a specific prayer. I wanted answers and I knew God could provide them. Now mind you, I had at the same time gotten the news of potential cervical cancer due to exposure to an STD, another scar of my impure life. The call came with the offer, but part of me still had to know, how much this man loved me. I made arrangements to go visit the facilty.
This would also give me the time and another day to get a vision of whether or not, cancer was invading me. I could also talk to the man about his loyalty to me. You see I thought it was the man in life and his loyalty to me that I needed to talk about, but really it was God that wanted me to see and talk to him!
As I sat with the man I loved, and went around a conversation for 2 hours, I came to read the scripture to him, James 5:16 – therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a rightetous man is powerful and effective. James 5:19- My brothers if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back, 20:- remember this : Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins.
I read it the first time- and a voice said “read it again” and I did. It was at that moment I found God was speaking to me- it was me that had wandered from the truth. It was me, God wanted to speak to- not the man I loved. Here I sat and basically was questioning this man’s fidelity and love to me, but God wanted to know my fidelity and love to him!
Go to part 2 Faithwoman
Part 2- Sharing Lesson
We went to sleep that night. The next morning, we went to breakfast, he was off in a zone, I said earth to Bernie- he said he was there but he was thinking of last night’s conversation. I said can we talk about it when we get home? When we got home, we got busy snowblowing the neighbor’s drive as we walked up the street, he said you know I do love you. We had dinner that night with the neighbor’s. When we got home and sat down to cigar time, I said you asked me why I would ask such a thing of you. It was at that moment that the past 46 years of my life poured out in pain.
I relived every untrust and betrayal that had happened to me in past relationships. It was then that I confessed, yes I look at your cell phone. I look to see who has called you, and who you are calling. Yes I see where you have called her, the unknown woman. The one who you told me, you would not call. He did not deny it. He stated she had called due to a lump found and she was scared. I cried in pain. I told him of what all the other men in my life had done to me. I looked at him through my tears and said all I ever wanted was to be loved! I wanted to be accepted. I wanted someone to love me. I looked at him and asked for forgiveness, he said you know it is easy to forgive and he was silent for a long time. I knew what he was thinking, it is easy to forgive, but do we ever forget? We prayed. I knew in my heart we cannot judge one another that we are taught by the word to love one another. We cannot show impartiality.
As we arose the next morning to go to the Lord’s house, the message started with a video of a man sitting in the aiport with luggage coming down from the plane, he talked about betrayal and hurts in life. As the video ended, Pastor Rob walked across the stage pulling a suitcase behind him, he looked out to the filled church and spoke “ how many of you sitting here today have past hurts, pains and feelings of betrayal?” How many of you can relate whether it been a spouse who hurt you? whether it have been a friend? “ and the list when on. He spoke you are not alone. Jesus was betrayed as well. Peter denied him three times. Even though Jesus was denied, he took the beatings. As the message went on, the Pastor walked over to the cross on stage and stated “ you no longer need to carry your baggage of hurts, pain and betrayal, leave them at the cross. Jesus died for you. He died to take all your hurts, pain and betrayal. As he dropped that suitcase at that cross, he stated it about having faith. Faith is not something that one can just say “ I have faith and life will be fine”, no it is a moment by moment walk with Jesus. Turning to him and having faith and trust in him. He can and has saved you. As I sat there in tears from the beginning of the message, I finally got it! God showed me what love and trust and faith was all about. Yes, the pastor said people will continue to betray us. They will continue to hurt us, but with Jesus, we can give this to him. Have faith and walk with him.
Oh what a cleansing it was. I had told God last week, that I was tired of getting up every morning feeling the way that I did with hidden sins heavy in my heart. I did not want to go on pretending anymore that all was ok. I did not want to go forward in my life anymore feeling the way I felt. Here all along, I kept feeling I could not trust. That no one was loving me the way I needed to loved. All along God wanted me to see it was him and is him that truly loves me. He will provide all I need. As I turn and have a relationship with him first and foremost, blessings will flow upon me.
Monday morning, I went back to the facility that offered me the position. I got to tour the facility. I prayed to the Lord, that if it is from you, have the gate be wide open. It was an awesome morning. The offer was even better than the first, plus they could provide temporary housing for me until I was able to relocate. I told God it was not about the money. It was his path for me that I sought. I left there to travel back home to have my procedure to check for cervical cancer. I prayed with the doctor before she did my procedure. I said Lord I give you all praises and thanks ! You are an awesome God. I am so thankful you led me to sexual purity and I sit here before you today Lord. We pray that there be no abnormality within my body, if there is dear Lord, we know you will handle it for me. She prepared me for the exam. As she examined me, I was in continuous prayer. I asked Jesus to take the pain for me. I only felt 10 seconds of pain throughout it all.
She completed the exam. She spoke “ I do not see any abnormality to the naked eye. I took some scrapings and took a sample from the inside of the cervix. We will send that off and hopefully all will be normal.”. I cannot begin to tell you how I felt! God is awesome! I gave thanks and praise to him! I wanted to shout to the world and I did as I was driving home. With such a cleansing of all fears and relief, I cried and gave thanks!
So there you have my journey of this past week-end. There is my lesson from God.
As I wrote this morning, I turned from the computer and got down on my knees and I cried once again! This time with tears of joy! I thanked God! I told him how awesome he was! I told him he has my heart, he has my whole being and to please guide me and use me as he wants to. The next step of my journey is to await the letter of intent from my new employer. Once I receive that, I will give notice. Upon doing this, I look forward with expectation as to how God will direct me. I know with all of this victory, Satan will come knocking really hard and powerful, because he does not want me to win the battle.
But God is so much stronger than Satan. He has Satan on a short leash. He will not allow Satan to tempt me any more than what his will for me is. God does and will provide a way out of temptation that comes my way and for that I am so thankful!
Glory and praise to our Lord Jesus Christ! He has risen ! He has risen indeed. One day he will come again, and it is awesome to know I am continuing on his journey to be ready for that day!
Faithwoman
Ok there you have my Lesson From God.. What a cleansing it has been.
I have been forgiven for it all. How mighty awesome is that!
We went to sleep that night. The next morning, we went to breakfast, he was off in a zone, I said earth to Bernie- he said he was there but he was thinking of last night’s conversation. I said can we talk about it when we get home? When we got home, we got busy snowblowing the neighbor’s drive as we walked up the street, he said you know I do love you. We had dinner that night with the neighbor’s. When we got home and sat down to cigar time, I said you asked me why I would ask such a thing of you. It was at that moment that the past 46 years of my life poured out in pain.
I relived every untrust and betrayal that had happened to me in past relationships. It was then that I confessed, yes I look at your cell phone. I look to see who has called you, and who you are calling. Yes I see where you have called her, the unknown woman. The one who you told me, you would not call. He did not deny it. He stated she had called due to a lump found and she was scared. I cried in pain. I told him of what all the other men in my life had done to me. I looked at him through my tears and said all I ever wanted was to be loved! I wanted to be accepted. I wanted someone to love me. I looked at him and asked for forgiveness, he said you know it is easy to forgive and he was silent for a long time. I knew what he was thinking, it is easy to forgive, but do we ever forget? We prayed. I knew in my heart we cannot judge one another that we are taught by the word to love one another. We cannot show impartiality.
As we arose the next morning to go to the Lord’s house, the message started with a video of a man sitting in the aiport with luggage coming down from the plane, he talked about betrayal and hurts in life. As the video ended, Pastor Rob walked across the stage pulling a suitcase behind him, he looked out to the filled church and spoke “ how many of you sitting here today have past hurts, pains and feelings of betrayal?” How many of you can relate whether it been a spouse who hurt you? whether it have been a friend? “ and the list when on. He spoke you are not alone. Jesus was betrayed as well. Peter denied him three times. Even though Jesus was denied, he took the beatings. As the message went on, the Pastor walked over to the cross on stage and stated “ you no longer need to carry your baggage of hurts, pain and betrayal, leave them at the cross. Jesus died for you. He died to take all your hurts, pain and betrayal. As he dropped that suitcase at that cross, he stated it about having faith. Faith is not something that one can just say “ I have faith and life will be fine”, no it is a moment by moment walk with Jesus. Turning to him and having faith and trust in him. He can and has saved you. As I sat there in tears from the beginning of the message, I finally got it! God showed me what love and trust and faith was all about. Yes, the pastor said people will continue to betray us. They will continue to hurt us, but with Jesus, we can give this to him. Have faith and walk with him.
Oh what a cleansing it was. I had told God last week, that I was tired of getting up every morning feeling the way that I did with hidden sins heavy in my heart. I did not want to go on pretending anymore that all was ok. I did not want to go forward in my life anymore feeling the way I felt. Here all along, I kept feeling I could not trust. That no one was loving me the way I needed to loved. All along God wanted me to see it was him and is him that truly loves me. He will provide all I need. As I turn and have a relationship with him first and foremost, blessings will flow upon me.
Monday morning, I went back to the facility that offered me the position. I got to tour the facility. I prayed to the Lord, that if it is from you, have the gate be wide open. It was an awesome morning. The offer was even better than the first, plus they could provide temporary housing for me until I was able to relocate. I told God it was not about the money. It was his path for me that I sought. I left there to travel back home to have my procedure to check for cervical cancer. I prayed with the doctor before she did my procedure. I said Lord I give you all praises and thanks ! You are an awesome God. I am so thankful you led me to sexual purity and I sit here before you today Lord. We pray that there be no abnormality within my body, if there is dear Lord, we know you will handle it for me. She prepared me for the exam. As she examined me, I was in continuous prayer. I asked Jesus to take the pain for me. I only felt 10 seconds of pain throughout it all.
She completed the exam. She spoke “ I do not see any abnormality to the naked eye. I took some scrapings and took a sample from the inside of the cervix. We will send that off and hopefully all will be normal.”. I cannot begin to tell you how I felt! God is awesome! I gave thanks and praise to him! I wanted to shout to the world and I did as I was driving home. With such a cleansing of all fears and relief, I cried and gave thanks!
So there you have my journey of this past week-end. There is my lesson from God.
As I wrote this morning, I turned from the computer and got down on my knees and I cried once again! This time with tears of joy! I thanked God! I told him how awesome he was! I told him he has my heart, he has my whole being and to please guide me and use me as he wants to. The next step of my journey is to await the letter of intent from my new employer. Once I receive that, I will give notice. Upon doing this, I look forward with expectation as to how God will direct me. I know with all of this victory, Satan will come knocking really hard and powerful, because he does not want me to win the battle.
But God is so much stronger than Satan. He has Satan on a short leash. He will not allow Satan to tempt me any more than what his will for me is. God does and will provide a way out of temptation that comes my way and for that I am so thankful!
Glory and praise to our Lord Jesus Christ! He has risen ! He has risen indeed. One day he will come again, and it is awesome to know I am continuing on his journey to be ready for that day!
Faithwoman
Ok there you have my Lesson From God.. What a cleansing it has been.
I have been forgiven for it all. How mighty awesome is that!
God's chart
HANDY LITTLE CHART God has a positive answer:
You say: "It's impossible"
God says:All things are possible
(Luke 18:27)
You say: "I'm too tired"
God says: I will give you rest
(Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: "Nobody really loves me"
God says: I love you
(John 3:1 6 & John 3:34 )
You say: "I can't go on"
God says: My grace is sufficient
(II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: "I can't figure things out"
God says: I will direct your steps
(Proverbs 3:5- 6)
You say: "I can't do it"
God says: You can do all things
(Philippians 4:13)
You say: "I'm not able"
God says: I am able
(II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: "It's not worth it"
God says: It will be worth it
(Roman 8:28 )
You say: "I can't forgive myself"
God says: I Forgive you
(I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: "I can't manage"
God says: I will supply all your needs
(Philippians 4:19)
You say: "I'm afraid"
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear
(II Timothy 1:7)
You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated"
God says: Cast all your cares on ME
(I Peter 5:7)
You say: "I'm not smart enough"
God says: I give you wisdom
(I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: "I feel all alone"
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you
(Hebrews 13:5)
PASS THIS ON.YOU NEVER KNOW WHO MAY BE IN NEED
HANDY LITTLE CHART God has a positive answer:
YOU SAY
BIBLE VERSES
You say: "It's impossible"
God says:All things are possible
(Luke 18:27)
You say: "I'm too tired"
God says: I will give you rest
(Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: "Nobody really loves me"
God says: I love you
(John 3:1 6 & John 3:34 )
You say: "I can't go on"
God says: My grace is sufficient
(II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: "I can't figure things out"
God says: I will direct your steps
(Proverbs 3:5- 6)
You say: "I can't do it"
God says: You can do all things
(Philippians 4:13)
You say: "I'm not able"
God says: I am able
(II Corinthians 9:8)
You say: "It's not worth it"
God says: It will be worth it
(Roman 8:28 )
You say: "I can't forgive myself"
God says: I Forgive you
(I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: "I can't manage"
God says: I will supply all your needs
(Philippians 4:19)
You say: "I'm afraid"
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear
(II Timothy 1:7)
You say: "I'm always worried and frustrated"
God says: Cast all your cares on ME
(I Peter 5:7)
You say: "I'm not smart enough"
God says: I give you wisdom
(I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: "I feel all alone"
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you
(Hebrews 13:5)
PASS THIS ON.YOU NEVER KNOW WHO MAY BE IN NEED
Have a super day! Faithwoman
Wow, my dear one, I can tell you that it's a very brave thing to share so much of your life like this - including your sin - for all to read. Some would even say this is not wise, and I can appreciate their point. However, I want to HONOUR you, as our great God HONOURS you, for this oh-so-open sharing with us, and for the way you are Walking with Him. I know you don't seek honour - but I am allowed to give you honour! *so there! lol*
Lessons you've been learning from God are lessons for all of us. He wants SO DESPERATELY for us ALL to stand up and truly BE HIS - no matter the cost, taking whatever steps are necessary to do this!
Bless you with every possible Spiritual blessing in the Lord Jesus Christ!!!
- BM and his Lady
- Status