To all the single ladies

I feel unhappy because of going to different churches especially those of Apostolic faith and pentecostal they believe and the bible say marriage cant be dissolved but by adultery my first marriage he beat me and I was just 19.. he took my kid.. that who is now in a abusive relationship now and has lost her kids age 22.. yes I committed adultery I was not saved I just wanted some one to love me I learned sex was not love... much latter on down the road. I believe I was forgiven because I was filled with the Holy Ghost in my second marriage but I went through 19 years of raising my second husbands kids and him and was mental abuse and he to was addicted to porn and he cheated on me getting oral sex with another woman both my first and second husband raped me all I wanted was to be loved because of the abuse in my family and being beat and raped and molested as a child. I back slid because of all the hate I had for my second and no time to heal from the first. I committed adultery on my second so we both broke the marriage convenit. So this guy my 3rd comes along a game nerd sweet as all get out treats me like gold and still does and I am happy with him except when he plays video games to much and neglects given me time but we have worked out a system now he does have ADHD too so that is a challenge in its self... I am just scared and praying that scripture that if a man marries a woman who has been divorced is committing adultery I don't want to live in.. sin NO matter what...Matter of fact in a whole how many Christians who have been married more then once and divorced other then adultery are they living in adultery ? I should of left when I found this husband's secret.. NO I don't know of if he did he look at child porn but nude sites with children is bad enough I should of left but I am such a sucker for helping and loving and wanting to be loved I helped him and he got help and I did too through counseling we both are in church God has spoken to me I believe he has not forsaken me because I have heard his voice many times in my 3rd marriage NO I WILL NOT COMMITTED ADULTERY AGAIN WHEN TIMES ARE TOUGH OR HE JUST DECIDES TO JUST START TO TREAT ME BAD... That is what I learned that God is the arms I should of ran into for my comfort and shield . I have also learned he is right in his word and he is truth I love God very much all I want to do is please him I have no desire for another man if my current husband and I split up especially if he decides he wants something better then me I will remain single and devoted to God my saviour who he truly is I am very strict now in my faith I messed up to much and time is to short but after all I have told you wouldnt you in my shoes feel like God is given up on you I don't feel it now as much because of assurance of his word and his presence but that one scripture.. I do know all sin is forgiven except blaspheme against the Holy ghost so its all in God hand that is why I dont want to move to the right or left I am against a wall I need Gods direction . God did at one time tell his people in the Old Test to leave the wives because they where married out of Gods will. I know King David committed adultery with Bathsheba and lost their child God did not ask him to divorce her or the hundreds of wives and girlfriends he had the word is the same old and new Grace was given through Jesus but grace is not LICENCE TO SIN BECAUSE OF FORGIVENESS WE HAVE TO STOP AND TURN FROM SIN..
 
Deuteronomy 30:11-14
Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, “Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, “Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it

2 Corinthians 7:1
Therefore, since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God

1 Peter 1:14-15
As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy”
 
And to add on, it's okay to be single. Some people are called to be single. It is a gift. Cherish it as such.

As a single Christian woman, I get frustrated when people do tell me about how a guy is coming for me and I must wait. If this isn't coming from the Lord, then I get a tad annoyed. I know that it's all done in kindness and they are trying to be encouraging, so it's easy just to shrug it off. But, isn't it okay for me to be fine in my singleness? I'm not miserable and am quite happy with where I am. But time after time after time, people feel the urge to "encourage" me. "Katie, you're beautiful and you deserve a man who treats you right." So, my looks are what I need to be treated right? That is shallow, if you ask me. We do not need popularity, money, men, women, and anything to know that everyone has worth to them. I feel the Christian community puts an emphasis on being married and that it is good. Which it is. Do not get me wrong. But what is wrong with being single? You don't hear many people preach the word that it is okay for people to be single. I am perfectly content in my singleness and am not interested in a relationship during this time. I know that I will be married because it has been prophesied and the Lord has already told me but I don't believe it's any time soon and that is okay.

However, there are people who are never married and that, my friend, is a gift and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

You must be in content in all seasons. Nothing is wrong with you if you're single. Be content. <3
 
I hope no one on here judges me for adultery as God is the only one but for some people get self righteous . what I did was wrong and what my exes did was wrong and two wrongs don't make right there is all kinds of people and what is so great about Jesus is he loved everyone and there is no separation he loved the woman at the well who had five husbands including one that was not her own and he loved the woman caught in the act of adultery . Jesus great grandmother was Rahab the Harlot he used Noah a drunkard and King David a man after Gods own heart who committed adultery and had her husband killed Saul murders of Christians who later became Paul the list goes own . The wages of sin is death but the gift of life is through Jesus Christ I have overcome I have learned my lesson about unequally yoked relationships I have learned how not seeking the Lord first and his kingdom leads to reaping what you have sown if you sow to the flesh and the lust of you will of the flesh reap corruption but if you sow to the spirit it brings freedom and victory. God is Good when you are truly repentant of sin you turn away and have nothing to do with it I have but I am living in what I have sown just as dysfunction has passed down from my family to me to mine when all along God should of been first it is what it is a very hard lesson learned I stand in fear as respect because if he didn't love us he wouldn't correct us and honer of my God and saviour... God bless his true servants who are obedient to his word..
 
psalms511 said:
I hope no one on here judges me for adultery as God is the only one but for some people get self righteous . what I did was wrong and what my exes did was wrong and two wrongs don't make right there is all kinds of people and what is so great about Jesus is he loved everyone and there is no separation he loved the woman at the well who had five husbands including one that was not her own and he loved the woman caught in the act of adultery . Jesus great grandmother was Rahab the Harlot he used Noah a drunkard and King David a man after Gods own heart who committed adultery and had her husband killed Saul murders of Christians who later became Paul the list goes own . The wages of sin is death but the gift of life is through Jesus Christ I have overcome I have learned my lesson about unequally yoked relationships I have learned how not seeking the Lord first and his kingdom leads to reaping what you have sown if you sow to the flesh and the lust of you will of the flesh reap corruption but if you sow to the spirit it brings freedom and victory. God is Good when you are truly repentant of sin you turn away and have nothing to do with it I have but I am living in what I have sown just as dysfunction has passed down from my family to me to mine when all along God should of been first it is what it is a very hard lesson learned I stand in fear as respect because if he didn't love us he wouldn't correct us and honer of my God and saviour... God bless his true servants who are obedient to his word..
Click to expand...

I went to an Apostolic Church and pentecoastal churches. I go there to help if the Lord sends me, not to soak up their crazy doctrines. Apostolic churches believe in Oneness, while Pentecoastals belive in Trinity. 1 in 3, 3 in 1................ Like oil and water, cats and dogs.

It's best to avoid churches that are Reliegious, and stick to ones that are scripture only. Jesus never said a blessed word about getting divorced and married again. Your not living in adultery, thats a lie and I can break down exactly what He said and meant if you want.

The reliegious leaders were asking him a question about it being lawful to put away. How the Apostolic faith and pentecoastal faith missed the question and misunderstood what Jesus said is beyond me.
If you don't pray in tongues, you can't be saved........... Working with the Apostolic faith did present it's challenges. I had to respect what they believed and smile, keeping me mouth shut.

If you really want a church that is Word only and scripture filled without the reliegion, I would suggest finding a Word of Faith Church. It's pentecoastal, minus the goofy doctrines. They believe in tongues and stuff, but it's more teaching word than all the other nonesense that goes on.

There are some good Baptist Churches, but minus the power of God. That is changing though, I know a few Baptist ministers that pray in tongues now and started practicing laying hands on the sick. It's a good sign.

Stay encouraged, you loose your joy, you loose your strength of the Lord and that leads to sin and problems.

Blessings.
 
Good people do dumb things, and hopefully live to regret them.
God forgives those who repent.
If people are giving you a hard time for mistakes of the past they are likely trying very hard to hide the skeletons in their own closet.
 
Hmm maybe try baptist church. Im single and nobody there ever says anything bout marriage to me. Other ppl in other churches do, or maybe its this particular church.

Jesus was single.
Paul was single.

I think..we all get judged everyday but nobody knows your heart and your life history like the one who made you, so other ppls judgements dont matter. I have learned, when Ive repented and made peace with God about my life..then what other people say about me is irrelevant. They dont know me and I dont need to constantly explain myself.

When people remark why havent you found anybody yet you are xx you should...I think what do you know. you are not God. I just say its all in Gods hands.

I am not going to bust a gut looking for someone who is 99.9% going to be wrong for me when the one who is right is the ONE who sees me...

Thank you for your honesty and telling it like it is, I think many christians put up a big facade with marriage and pretend it is happy when its difficult even with believers. Just the other week heard the youth pastor and his wife split..they have 4 children.,I think could see it coming even though they both put up a big show about happy families in church..im sure they will get back together eventually but that is also in Gods hands.

If your husband is an unbeliever, have you had an honest talk with him about whether he wants to stay and leave and let him know how unhappy you in this situation? Cos God says you are not called to bondage but to live in peace. You dont have to leave it is the unbeliever who decides whether to stay and go..and if you are submitting to God, it says in scripture the devil will flee.
 
My husband believes more and more day to day he just not willing to submit I have talked with him many times about it and I am happy but like I said you go to Apostolic or Pentecostal and they make that once scripture in matthew about marriage and divorce. God knows my life and my situation I am very happy to stay with my husband as long as tho I am not living in sin in my Lords eyes. Only thing I pray is my husband to draw near to God and become a Godly man and put God first and not his games....
 
By Faith said:
I went to an Apostolic Church and pentecoastal churches. I go there to help if the Lord sends me, not to soak up their crazy doctrines. Apostolic churches believe in Oneness, while Pentecoastals belive in Trinity. 1 in 3, 3 in 1................ Like oil and water, cats and dogs.

It's best to avoid churches that are Reliegious, and stick to ones that are scripture only. Jesus never said a blessed word about getting divorced and married again. Your not living in adultery, thats a lie and I can break down exactly what He said and meant if you want.

The reliegious leaders were asking him a question about it being lawful to put away. How the Apostolic faith and pentecoastal faith missed the question and misunderstood what Jesus said is beyond me.
If you don't pray in tongues, you can't be saved........... Working with the Apostolic faith did present it's challenges. I had to respect what they believed and smile, keeping me mouth shut.

If you really want a church that is Word only and scripture filled without the reliegion, I would suggest finding a Word of Faith Church. It's pentecoastal, minus the goofy doctrines. They believe in tongues and stuff, but it's more teaching word than all the other nonesense that goes on.

There are some good Baptist Churches, but minus the power of God. That is changing though, I know a few Baptist ministers that pray in tongues now and started practicing laying hands on the sick. It's a good sign.

Stay encouraged, you loose your joy, you loose your strength of the Lord and that leads to sin and problems.

Blessings.
Click to expand...
It's best to avoid churches that are Rel Religious and stick to ones that are scripture only. Jesus never said a blessed word about getting divorced and married again. Your not living in adultery, thats a lie and I can break down exactly what He said and meant if you want.

Please do......... iI would appreciate your view
 
psalms511 said:
It's best to avoid churches that are Rel Religious and stick to ones that are scripture only. Jesus never said a blessed word about getting divorced and married again. Your not living in adultery, thats a lie and I can break down exactly what He said and meant if you want.

Please do......... iI would appreciate your view
Click to expand...

This will be a bit long. Please read it over and over carefully.
Any doctrine that puts someone under condemation or bondage to keep works is a doctrine of devils. It's false Doctrine.

There are two Greek Words.

One means to divorce the other means to put away.
They are two different things. Some translations translated both the same though, and confuse the issue.

What God said about marriage and divorce:

Deu 24:1-4 kjv+ 1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife. 3 And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife; 4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife,

A man may divorce His wife if she no longer finds favor in his eyes. The man must give her a bill of divorcement. It must be a written document in her hand to prove she no longer belongs to that man and she is free to marry again. That bill kept her safe from being accused of adultery or any number of bad things that happened to women in those days.
She can marry again, no issues.

What God said about putting away:

Lev 21:7 kjva They shall not take a wife that is a whore, or profane; neither shall they take a woman put away from her husband: for he is holy unto his God.

Jer 3:1 kjva They say, If a man put away his wife, and she go from him, and become another man's, shall he return unto her again? shall not that land be greatly polluted? but thou hast played the harlot with many lovers; yet return again to me, saith the LORD.

Putting away was a seperation. Men would feel shamed if His wife left and married someone else. Without that bill of divorcement, she could not go anywhere. The practice was then to take another wife, and keep the old wife in bondage unable to marry another.

Mal 2:14-16 kjva 14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. 15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. 16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.

You could not just keep your wife of youth who you have a covenant marraige with and put her away. She had to be set free, and without that bill of divorcement, she could go nowhere and stay to be mistreated. God hates putting away.

What Jesus say?

Mat 5:31-32 YLT 31 `And it was said, That whoever may put away his wife, let him give to her a writing of divorce; 32 but I--I say to you, that whoever may put away his wife, save for the matter of whoredom, doth make her to commit adultery; and whoever may marry her who hath been put away doth commit adultery.

Jesus is not going to say something diferent than God said in His Word. He said the same exact thing. You can't just put away a wife, she go marry another. To have sex with someone else while still married to the first is called Adultery.

Mar 10:2-12 YLT 2 And the Pharisees, having come near, questioned him, if it is lawful for a husband to put away a wife, tempting him,

They were hoping Jesus said it was OK to put away a wife. Their question did not include bill of divorcement. Jesus ask them, What did Moses say. They were trying to trip him up. Jesus refered back to What God said in the OT.


3 and he answering said to them, `What did Moses command you?' 4 and they said, `Moses suffered to write a bill of divorce, and to put away.'

In order to put away, you had to give that bill of divorcement. They are two different things. Their question only included putting away, until Jesus asked them what did Moses say.

5 And Jesus answering said to them, `For the stiffness of your heart he wrote you this command, 6 but from the beginning of the creation, a male and a female God did make them; 7 on this account shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, 8 and they shall be--the two--for one flesh; so that they are no more two, but one flesh; 9 what therefore God did join together, let not man put asunder.' 10 And in the house again his disciples of the same thing questioned him,

Jesus said Husband and wife become one flesh, and let not man seperate what God joined together. The disciples were confused by this, because it was lawful to write a bill of divorcement. Jesus did not say bill of divorce, He said put asunder or seperate. (Put away)
So they asked Jesus again to repeat what he said.

11 and he saith to them, `Whoever may put away his wife, and may marry another, doth commit adultery against her; 12 and if a woman may put away her husband, and is married to another, she committeth adultery.'

He said the same thing again. You can't just seperate and marry another. The disciples were confused about the One flesh thing, but Jesus reminds them it's putting away that is the issue without that bill of divorcement.

Women with 5 husbands:

Joh 4:16-19 kjva 16 Jesus saith unto her, Go, call thy husband, and come hither. 17 The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband: 18 For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly. 19 The woman saith unto him, Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet.

Notice Jesus had the issue with the the one she was living with not being her Husband.

Jesus called all 5 of the last men HUSABANDS.......... That means each of the 5 were Real and valid Husbands. Otherwise He would have said you had 5 men, or something else. To be called a husband, you have to be married and each of the 5 husbands were legit, otherwise Jesus would not have called them Husbands.

That is the Scripture, line upon line for where it started in God's word, to what Jesus said.
Jesus would never contradict Moses, or God's word. He set fouth that a Husband and wife are one flesh and tied to each other, you just don't put away (Seperate) and find another.

Sorry so long.
 
I have a dear sister in christ who I met in this other church (not the baptist, it was a presy) and she is married to an unbeliever who had a drinking problem. He is sober now, I don't know what she went through she has children but by the grace of God she makes the best of it. They just live together peacefully - have separate bedrooms and I guess not truly man and wife cos of the unequal yoking, she goes to church, he doesn't, although..he did come to our home group regularly cos of other men there. I don't know how much of the gospel he understood (he is bit deaf) but she reports that was a big step for him. They are now retired. He could have left but he didn't want to - she could have said..your problem is too much for me (or God) to handle and shown him the door. She doesn't have eyes for any other man only God and does her art and is not unhappy of course she prays for her husband and it's difficult when he goes his own way not God's. I pray for them both, I think they mellowed out in their old age but she did say she went to al-anon for a while for support.
with addicts they are not aware that their behaviour/sin is going to kill them eventually as they live in denial.

There is scripture for 12 steps of not just drinking but addictions in general. I think it's recovery churches like salvation army that specialise in this.
Yes I agree with you on those scriptures about adultery, you cannot solve your marriage problems by going to yet another man. I get annoyed when married men who are having problems hit on me as if I can solve their love-less marriage by escaping it. Ask God to give you peace in your situation. I think many women put up with an awful lot, if your safety is endangered sure call the police which is what some of my friends did. But the key is to communicate with your spouse I think..whether it's words or some other means..and I would always recommend the 5 love languages book. Love covers a multitude of sins.

It is very hard if you love someone and that person doesn't seem to love you back. Relationships and marriages are meant to be two-way. and three way up to heaven if you are a Christian.

Praying for you..
ps.
 
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