The Loneliness Is Suffocating

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Since the beginning of August my wife and I have been separated and she has filed for divorce, to which I have already sent in my responses to the divorce petition.

This has been a long time coming I guess as she had been saying it since a couple months after we got married. Things never really were good from the start and even before we were married. We got married because she was breaking up with me and I kept hearing marry her in my mind, so I told her that, and three days later we were married. From the start she was saying we didn't belong together. Now that we are separated I can only agree with her. We are much better as friends than spouses.

From a couple days after we separated I have felt relieved that we were no longer together, that a weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I have peace, peace at least about the separation and divorce. I do have fear and I will explain that below.

I will say that the loneliness is suffocating. I literally have no one to go hang out with to get my mind off of things. All my friends except for one, were her friends first and foremost. So once we separated, they no longer want anything to do with me. My one friend that was mine solely as I knew her when I lived in Pennsylvania and her New Jersey, while talking to me, she doesn't want to hang out. So I sit here all day long, except for when doing a photography job or pet sitting feeling loneliness and all out fear.

Fear because if how I have been told the scriptures are explained in regards to remarriage, I cannot be remarried. Which means I will die completely alone and that terrifies me. I have never been on my own. There has always, always been someone there with me. I am terrified of being alone, of dying alone. I want to remarry in several years, I want to spend my life with someone who will stay with me the rest of my life. Someone I can physically hold hands with, hug, and share the ups and downs with. Someone who will love me for me, not who they want me to be, or imagined I should be.

Please tell me there is nothing to fear, that I can remarry, that I will not be alone the rest of my life.
 
There is nothing to fear in the Lord Jesus Who will be with you if you repent and surrender to Him. You won't need anyone at all and you certainly wouldn't die alone because His angels will take you to Him. Jesus isn't some historical figure, He's very much a part of the lives of those who love and obey Him in a very tangible way. You just have to have faith. Your marrying days are over according to the word of God.
 
There is nothing to fear in the Lord Jesus Who will be with you if you repent and surrender to Him. You won't need anyone at all and you certainly wouldn't die alone because His angels will take you to Him. Jesus isn't some historical figure, He's very much a part of the lives of those who love and obey Him in a very tangible way. You just have to have faith. Your marrying days are over according to the word of God.

What I mean by dying alone is dying without a spouse by my side.

If I can no longer remarry, then I am no longer a Christian! I will not be held to loneliness because my spouse wanted a divorce.

I will not be forced to live in misery and loneliness. It's not going to happen!
 
Is there anyway to have my account removed form this site?

Since I am no longer a Christian I have no further need of it.
 
What I mean by dying alone is dying without a spouse by my side.

If I can no longer remarry, then I am no longer a Christian! I will not be held to loneliness because my spouse wanted a divorce.

I will not be forced to live in misery and loneliness. It's not going to happen!
No longer a Christian BC you have no spouse??? There are some Christians who are starving and haven't cursed God yet... I know everyone has their breaking point. ...i feel I'm reaching mine ....but to leave god BC you have no spouse seems silly..

But then again, I never had any real friends or a boyfriend so I'm accustomed to loneliness.
 
What I mean by dying alone is dying without a spouse by my side.

If I can no longer remarry, then I am no longer a Christian! I will not be held to loneliness because my spouse wanted a divorce.

I will not be forced to live in misery and loneliness. It's not going to happen!
If you have friends or people that care about you you aren't realling dying alone..and even if you did have a spouse, its no guarantee you two would die together, she could pass before you or you before her and in that sense , you'd still be dying alone..
 
If you have friends or people that care about you you aren't realling dying alone..and even if you did have a spouse, its no guarantee you two would die together, she could pass before you or you before her and in that sense , you'd still be dying alone..

I would have lived my life with her till either one of us dies.

My mom is 62 and will not be around till I die. I have no friends that seem to really care about me. Sure, they talk to me, but it's out of pity, not because they care.

I am truly alone, I really have no one.
 
No longer a Christian BC you have no spouse??? There are some Christians who are starving and haven't cursed God yet... I know everyone has their breaking point. ...i feel I'm reaching mine ....but to leave god BC you have no spouse seems silly..

But then again, I never had any real friends or a boyfriend so I'm accustomed to loneliness.

If it is God that keeps me from remarrying because a spouse left me, then I don't need God in my life. I will not be alone the rest of my life.
 
Sorry to hear that...

*[[Luk 14:26]] KJV* If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.​
 
Sorry to hear that...

*[[Luk 14:26]] KJV* If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.​

That's true.... I have no friends so.... I have nothing to lose.
 
Sorry to hear that...

*[[Luk 14:26]] KJV* If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.​

He never meant to literally hate them, after all we are commanded to love all. Cannot hate and love at the same time.

I am glad that I am not a disciple anymore. It's freeing, it truly is. Now I know that I will not be alone the rest of my life because of some silly rule!
 
*[[Pro 18:24]] KJV* A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

That world be Jesus :)
 
I would have lived my life with her till either one of us dies.

My mom is 62 and will not be around till I die. I have no friends that seem to really care about me. Sure, they talk to me, but it's out of pity, not because they care.

I am truly alone, I really have no one.


Well I have no friends either and I'm 24 :) these are supposed to be the "best yrs" but I'm spending them alone... It doesn't bother me much anymore...

But honestly you can't be too attached to people BC people die.. But god doesn't, I remember seeing on the news of newly weds and before they got home, they were in an accident and the wife died...life can be taken like that..

So being married doesn't ensure you wont be alone..

However I understand how you feel, just hope you change your mind ..... BC its better to lose everything n have god than to lose everything and god too...
 
*[[Pro 18:24]] KJV* A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

That world be Jesus :)

Sorry, He may be there, but He is not here. He cannot do things with me, He cannot sit next to me and fish with me, He cannot hold me and I literally feel Him touching me. I need someone in the physical realm.
 
Banned only I believe... I won't ban you. Jesus died for you, He only wants the best for you. Why won't you believe Him?

Do I need to start cursing to get banned?

If he wanted the best for me, then I would not have to be alone the rest of my life and miserable. That is what is best for me. Not some dumb rule that says I cannot remarry. There is no reason for it in this day and age!
 
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