Habitat for Humanity

Lanolin said:
Read this and pray about what you have done and your attitudes towards your children and their home.

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I read the article: "In addition to the nostalgia and the grief, this friend worried that she would never be able to afford to buy in the same suburb where she was raised, and where she had always wanted to bring up her own children."

The main theme I read is that the issue is one of being selfish. It's not so much that the "family house" is being sold, but that it is being sold before the "child" is able to buy his/her own home and move out on his/her own terms.

For the record, none of my kids were thrown out of this house, they just grew up, became responsible adults, and headed off to the great unknown journey that is life (just like I did). I do not know anyone that did not start off renting some horrible little place that was falling apart. That is part of the struggle that makes up the memories.

Rtm
 
Parents being selfish isn't anything new RTM.

Parents selling the house isn't actually connected with not being able to buy a house in the suburb one is raised in, its just one of the many ADDITIONAL worries.
 
I heard some suburban developments are being delayed by a year or more, and people waiting for these new homes are delaying having families because of this.

Not sure why (the delays for the devlopment - red tape? )but I suppose the young couples just don't have the room to have any children where they are, or there are no schools or places in schools for them. Also not safe or there is nowhere to play.
 
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I'm sure people in Ukraine, especially children, are not liking living where they are right now, where they have no choice but to leave their homeland but I suppose you COULD frame it as 'the great unknown' of life's journey. ?!

Unfortunately, I know many many people thrown out of their house and living on the streets. Some not even reaching adulthood some as young as 13. They were not even renting some horrible place, they were squatting somewhere under a bridge or living in a car. For some its safer on the streets than in a broken home full of violence.
 
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Lanolin said:
I heard some suburban developments are being delayed by a year or more, and people waiting for these new homes are delaying having families because of this.

Not sure why (the delays for the devlopment - red tape? )but I suppose the young couples just don't have the room to have any children where they are, or there are no schools or places in schools for them. Also not safe or there is nowhere to play.
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They might just be mature about this. My son and his wife fiat waited to finish college, then to start their careers, then their first house, and now have a larger house. They feel they are now ready to start a family. Sounds logical to me.
 
Well it makes sense to wait, I think those who start families too young really struggle, but a lot of people don't wait. And then theres others that leave it too late.
And those who choose not to have their own families at all. I don't know if it's a hardship really but the newspapers like to put a spin on it.
 
In NZ it's not like the US where land is all individually owned.

Traditionally its always been collectively managed. Before the europeans came and sectioned everything, land was looked after tribally. The Maori called it whenua, meaning placenta. It's a place were you bury your placenta. Where you are from is your 'turangawaewae' meaning a place for you to stand.
The concept of buying and selling such land individually was foreign.

I'm not sure that the European way ever sat right with the Maori way, they have two different concepts of what land means to them. They also had different concepts over what constitutes property. Inheritance also seems like an issue between generations. I don't have any inheritance, and I don't expect any. But a lot of offspring might have land or assets given that they then have to sell on cos they cannot use it, or its so degraded they cannot keep it.
 
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Lanolin said:
I'm sure people in Ukraine, especially children, are not liking living where they are right now, where they have no choice but to leave their homeland but I suppose you COULD frame it as 'the great unknown' of life's journey. ?!

Unfortunately, I know many many people thrown out of their house and living on the streets. Some not even reaching adulthood some as young as 13. They were not even renting some horrible place, they were squatting somewhere under a bridge or living in a car. For some its safer on the streets than in a broken home full of violence.
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I get it. My entire family left Cuba when I was 44 days old. My parents struggled most of their lives. We never got to live in a car; however, I believe my sister did for a while.

I don't get it. They were "thrown out of their house" and they were squatting?
 
Land supply is short, it is not like it was in pioneer days.
But I do know in history private emigration companies sold a lot of people this idea of a settlement where they could live, and when they got here, there was just nothing. It was all a big con!
 
Well the homeless kids would be thrown out or they'd run away from their parents (depends on who's story you believe) and they'd end up squatting in abandoned warehouses, or empty homes. Some would hang out in the library.

I know cos I worked in public libraries.
 
They'd either end up in jail or on drugs, their parents wouldn't take them in. They couldn't find places to live and sometimes, even if they had jobs etc (if they knew how to get them) it just wouldn't be enough to afford anywhere. And nobody would rent to them without a job.

But its not just the homeless, its the soon-to-be homeless when selfish parents don't leave their children any hope for the future. This is one of main the reasons for high youth suicide rate.

What legacy are parents leaving their children, very little. Children as young as 8 years old worry about these things. And on top of that pollution is harming their future.
 
Lanolin said:
They'd either end up in jail or on drugs, their parents wouldn't take them in. They couldn't find places to live and sometimes, even if they had jobs etc (if they knew how to get them) it just wouldn't be enough to afford anywhere. And nobody would rent to them without a job.

But its not just the homeless, its the soon-to-be homeless when selfish parents don't leave their children any hope for the future. This is one of main the reasons for high youth suicide rate.

What legacy are parents leaving their children, very little. Children as young as 8 years old worry about these things. And on top of that pollution is harming their future.
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I don't get this legacy thing. My parents passed away, when I was in my mid 50s and already retired once. At the time, all they had could fit in a closet. Their legacy to me was my memories of them, some pictures, and small "nick nacks". That was good enough. My dad left an old car, which we donated. There was a scratch off lotto card in the glove compartment. He had won $2.00, which I cashed in and buried with him. There was also some insurance money, but not very much, and I paid for it throughout the years.

As a young man, I looked very much forward to leaving home and building a life for myself. I turned 18 in July and left home in August. When I retired and moved back, I took my parents in with us. I was just glad they were still around and did not expect anything from them. They gave me the one thing I could not give myself - me.

rtm
 
rtm3039 said:
I don't get this legacy thing. My parents passed away, when I was in my mid 50s and already retired once. At the time, all they had could fit in a closet. Their legacy to me was my memories of them, some pictures, and small "nick nacks". That was good enough. My dad left an old car, which we donated. There was a scratch off lotto card in the glove compartment. He had won $2.00, which I cashed in and buried with him. There was also some insurance money, but not very much, and I paid for it throughout the years.

As a young man, I looked very much forward to leaving home and building a life for myself. I turned 18 in July and left home in August. When I retired and moved back, I took my parents in with us. I was just glad they were still around and did not expect anything from them. They gave me the one thing I could not give myself - me.

rtm
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I originally left home when I was 18, but moved back in while I attended college. Although it wasn't expected (or desired) that I return home as an adult, I would always have been welcome if I needed to get back on my feet, should the need have arisen. Our family is scattered across the globe, but we love and care for one another and will always be there for each other. I imagine most families feel the same way.

That being said, culture sure plays a major role as to how people view the different issues brought up in this thread. There is not a specific 'right' or 'wrong' way to handle property ownership, legacies, etc., as long as we respect others' viewpoints on these matters, it's all good.

Blessings!
 
paidforinfull said:
I originally left home when I was 18, but moved back in while I attended college. Although it wasn't expected (or desired) that I return home as an adult, I would always have been welcome if I needed to get back on my feet, should the need have arisen. Our family is scattered across the globe, but we love and care for one another and will always be there for each other. I imagine most families feel the same way.

That being said, culture sure plays a major role as to how people view the different issues brought up in this thread. There is not a specific 'right' or 'wrong' way to handle property ownership, legacies, etc., as long as we respect others' viewpoints on these matters, it's all good.

Blessings!
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Had it been up to my parents, I would have never left home. My mom actually was upset enough where she did not speak to me for a couple of years.

Wife and I have five "kids." All, but one has come back at least once. Our oldest has been back at least five times and is back home again now.

Rtm
 
rtm3039 said:
Had it been up to my parents, I would have never left home. My mom actually was upset enough where she did not speak to me for a couple of years.

Wife and I have five "kids." All, but one has come back at least once. Our oldest has been back at least five times and is back home again now.

Rtm
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That is great - your family is very fortunate! You are obviously a close and caring family :).

What a blessing!
 
I was reading about housing projects in the US. They seem to be very bad. In other countries they are not like that. I wonder who the landlords are and whether they really care about their tenants or just let them live in substandard conditions that threaten their health.

In NZ by law you need to have heating, and insulation. Your building cannot be leaky. You need to repair and maintain your property. You need to make sure it's secure and safe to live in. I don't understand why some landlords just let their properties go and then blame the tenants.
 
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RTM that is very invidualistic to think your parents gave you yourself. Not saying its wrong but ...just a different way of seeing it. I know my parents didn't give me just me. They gave me brothers and sisters too.

God didn't give people just themselves. He gave them a home and a land of milk and honey. As long as they obeyed Him and looked after the land He would bless them and their descendants...and the blessings were fruitfulness and abundance.

In Christ we are given a spiritual inheritance, a worldwide family, a new name, and also, a heavenly home. God sees a bigger picture than just, me myself and I. For me Heaven doesn't just have myself in it. There are all these others who I am going to live with for eternity. I don't beat up my brothers and sisters just so I can be in God's good book as the one and only.
 
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Lanolin said:
I was reading about housing projects in the US. They seem to be very bad. In other countries they are not like that. I wonder who the landlords are and whether they really care about their tenants or just let them live in substandard conditions that threaten their health.

In NZ by law you need to have heating, and insulation. Your building cannot be leaky. You need to repair and maintain your property. You need to make sure it's secure and safe to live in. I don't understand why some landlords just let their properties go and then blame the tenants.
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Hi Lanolin
All countries have housing problems. We all have our share of good and bad landlords and good and bad tenants. People who keep the laws and people who break the laws. There isn't one country that I can think of, where it is perfect and that is because we are all himan beings. One day it will be perfect and the earth will be filled with love.
 
Lanolin said:
RTM that is very invidualistic to think your parents gave you yourself. Not saying its wrong but ...just a different way of seeing it. I know my parents didn't give me just me. They gave me brothers and sisters too.

God didn't give people just themselves. He gave them a home and a land of milk and honey. As long as they obeyed Him and looked after the land He would bless them and their descendants...and the blessings were fruitfulness and abundance.

In Christ we are given a spiritual inheritance, a worldwide family, a new name, and also, a heavenly home. God sees a bigger picture than just, me myself and I. For me Heaven doesn't just have myself in it. There are all these others who I am going to live with for eternity. I don't beat up my brothers and sisters just so I can be in God's good book as the one and only.
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Nicely said, but just do not know what this has to do with our conversation. Are you comparing my parents with God?

Thy give me a sister and a puppy. When we moved into an apartment that did not allow pets, they did make me drive the dog to the pound. Not a good day and, oddly enough, the first time I have thought about that in over 40 years. :(
 
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